No Strings Attached: How To Perfectly Execute A One-Night Stand

Has it been a while? Are you out for revenge? Or was the guy at the bar just so hot that you needed to know what being with him felt like? One-night stands can serve many purposes, but they all end with the same goal: you getting yours.

Whether you’re out with friends or hanging by yourself at the bar, it takes effort to execute the perfect one-night stand.

In order to make sure that your short-lived relationship has no long-term consequences, here are some rules to follow:

Always carry condoms.

I don’t know what it is with girls these days, but they still don’t carry condoms! Why not? It’s responsible and safe. If you don’t have them, make a stop to get some. You don't want to be caught in a bind when you're on the prowl.

Be bold and go for it.

A confident glance across a room goes a long way. Once you’re ready, slyly join his conversation and make your interest known. If he's playing pool at the bar, ask to play the next game. If there’s space next to him, go fill it. The worst that can happen is that you’re rejected by a stranger and have to move on to the next guy or bar.

Ask him for his name -- and remember it.

There’s nothing worse than forgetting someone’s name after you’ve slept together. We’re all inclined to be as liberal as we want, but a name is important when bumping uglies. Trust me when I say it'll make you feel better.

If you don’t catch his name, just be sure to not to call him anyone else’s during the act.

Keep the conversation light.

For most people, talking politics or work isn’t a turn on. Find light topics and roll with those. A casual conversation about your hometowns or favorite sports and movies always works. Be intimate in sex, not conversation.

Use body language to tell him you want him.

He’ll respond to the signals you give, but you have to make your desires clear. Subtle touching and close talking let him know you’re interested.

You could be a little more direct with questions like “So, your place or mine?” or “What are you doing now?” Once the plan is decided, keep the conversation going and grab some booze on the way for the drink you may need at his place.

It’s important to be upfront about your intentions without being too forthcoming.

Go to his place.

This is called “traveling.” It helps you leave in the morning without needing to host. If at any point in the night you feel like you don’t want to be there anymore, you can simply leave. (And it’s always a good idea to let a friend know where you are in case of emergency.)

If it makes you feel safer to go to your place, that’s fine. But be sure to tell him during the night that you need to leave quickly in the morning. That way, he knows there won't be too much hanging out once the sun rises.

Charge your phone.

You’ll need it in the morning. Phone chargers are pretty universal these days, so it’s likely he’ll have the charger you need. Or, better yet, travel with one at all times. You never know when you’ll need an Uber, a friend’s ear or Google Maps.

Don’t take off your jewelry, and keep all your clothes in one place.

Women always leave their jewelry behind, and it’s a bitch to get back (if you get it back at all). While it’s hard to stay organized in the the thrall of passion, try to keep your things in the same place for a smooth exit. By doing this, you won’t wake him if you’re sneaking out, and you won’t lose any of your precious belongings. Nothing is worse than remembering you left your expensive watch at a random guy’s place and are not sure how to get it back.

LET LOOSE.

Get what you want out of this night. You have nothing to lose but your inhibitions. Let your freak flag fly and enjoy yourself! But remember to use those condoms you brought with you. You don’t need to feel guilty tomorrow morning.

Speaking of tomorrow morning...

Say no to breakfast.

Sure, you might be hungry after your late-night workout, but breakfast can wait. You can grab something on your way home, or you can eat with a friend and recap the night. You’re keeping this casual, and a one-night stand doesn’t have the word "morning" in it.

Let him ask for your number.

Asking for his number puts the ball in your court, and you don't want that. If he wants your number, he'll have to ask. If he wants to call, that’s on him. But you’re not interested in seeing him again. If you don't give him your number, he'll know that you were in this thing for one night only. If you are interested in keeping in touch and potentially seeing him again, then you're reading the wrong article.

Give a kiss goodbye, and walk out confidently.

You did it! Now get home and take a shower -- you’ve successfully had a one-night stand full of condoms, confidence and candor.