New Line Cinema

20 Excuses We've All Heard From Guys Who Weren't Into Us

By
Share
Ad failed to load

I remember reading an interview Scarlett Johansson did with Cosmo back in April. She was talking about chasing some guy who was "forever unavailable… but, like, so attractively unavailable."

She went on to talk about how she'd wait outside of bars trying to get a hold of him while her friends were inside waiting, and how she'd take a cab to go find him at God knows what time of night.

The point was, he just wasn't into her. And she had to accept it and move on.

Ad failed to load

I remember reading this interview and LOLing.

First of all, who in their right mind is rejecting Scarlett Johansson?

Second, if we're living in a world where Beyoncé gets cheated on and Scarlett Johansson is getting rejected outside of bars, literally ALL of us are going to be rejected at one point or another.

Ad failed to load

And with every dumb rejection, comes an even dumber excuse.

So, read along and take a trip down memory lane as we go through 20 of the most bullshit excuses guys have used to reject us.

1. "I've been so busy lately."

Oh! THAT'S why he's literally been ignoring your existence. Wow, I bet you feel so much better now that you know.

Ad failed to load

2. "I'm not looking for a relationship right now."

Flash forward two months, and there are engagement pictures of him and his new girlfriend fiancée.

3. "I just got out of a serious relationship."

And, of course, that means he can't be in one ever again. Duh!

Ad failed to load

4. "I'm afraid of commitment."

This seems to be a fear he never intends on facing.

Ad failed to load

5. "I'm scared I would hurt you."

Yes, because rejecting me right now is not at all painful.

6. "I'm a bad texter."

Right. Because responding to my "hi" text was so difficult.

Ad failed to load

7. "I met someone else."

WHEN? We literally spend EVERY night together.

8. "I'm focusing on my career right now."

And, of course, that means I need to go because apparently I'm high-maintenance bitch who demands all of your time.

Ad failed to load

9. "I don't believe in monogamous relationships."

OK, Hef.

10. "I'm just not ready for a serious relationship."

Nor have you ever been in one, so there's that.

Ad failed to load

11. "I don't want to rush into anything too soon."

Yeah, you're right. We've only been doing this for a year. Let's take some more time.

12. "I just think you're too good for me."

It doesn't matter that I think we'd be a good match...

Ad failed to load

13. "I wouldn't be the boyfriend you deserve right now."

Why not? Because you're just a total and complete dingus?

14. "I just moved here and need time to adjust."

And I guess I would be a HUGE detriment to this whole "adjustment" process.

Ad failed to load

15. "I don't really have time for a girlfriend right now."

Again, apparently I'm way too high maintenance and time consuming.

16. "I don't think I'm the right guy for you."

But the fact that I do seems to be completely irrelevant... ? Right. Because I can't think for myself.

Ad failed to load

17. "I'm going through some family stuff right now."

That'd be a great excuse, if you actually were. But, ya know, it's not so much of a great excuse when it's not true.

18. "I really want to be single, for now."

You also really just don't want to date me.

Ad failed to load

19. "I want to enjoy being young and going out, for now."

And, apparently, that's not something we can do together.

20. "I don't want a relationship to come between our friendship."

WELL, I DON'T WANT THIS FRIENDSHIP TO COME BETWEEN OUR RELATIONSHIP.

Ad failed to load

Citations: Scarlett Johansson on Efforts to Defund Planned Parenthood: "We're Moving Backward" (Cosmopolitan)

Ad failed to load

Must Reads

Your Weekly Horoscope Is Here & Luckily, It's All Good Things

Pat yourself on the back because you survived not only one but two major eclipses. The last few weeks have been one obstacle after another but you made it. You dealt with the pain, held it together, and prevailed. Now, your February 19, 2018 weekly h…
By Roya Backlund

6 Subtle Red Flags That Could Mean You’re Sleeping Way Too Much

Have you ever woken up after an unusually long night of sleep and felt, well, kind of awful? Whether you roll out of bed feeling super dehydrated, nursing a throbbing a headache, or you simply feel stiff as a board, there are reasons why your body mi…
By Annakeara Stinson

These 6 Workouts Can Be Done Right On Your Couch, & Yes, They Do Count As Exercise

Ever have that feeling when you're watching the Olympics like you should be working out, or at least stretching, but in reality you're just laying around eating chips? Yeah, me neither. But if you do ever feel that pull to work out when you're just l…
By Annakeara Stinson

10 Things You Should Say To Your Partner Every Day To Keep The Love Alive

When it coms to love, falling into it is a lot easier than maintaining it. There’s a reason, after all, that it's called "falling" in love, because it's mostly out of your control — the heart just takes over. Because those emotions come so easily and…
By Rachel Shatto

Science Says These 8 Foods Can Help You Live Longer, So Eat Up

If you're looking to live forever, or at least for an appropriately long amount of time, then the best way to get started on your journey toward immortality is to think about what you're putting into your body for fuel. Think of your diet as the batt…
By Caroline Burke

I Live In London & When Guys Find Out I'm American, They Only See Me As A Fling

I first entered the world of dating apps during a semester abroad in London, and I had zero idea what I was getting myself into. I was 21, had only ever dated boys I'd met through work, school, or mutual friends, and my appreciation for romantic come…
By Genevieve Wheeler

Here's Exactly How You'll Fall In Love, Based On Your Astrological Sign

One of my favorite things about learning about my zodiac sign and others' is learning patterns about my behavior that I can acknowledge and use to my advantage. As a Scorpio sun sign, I know I'm typically described as mysterious, drawn to loyal peopl…
By Elana Rubin

These 8 Red Flags Might Mean You're Pushing Yourself Too Hard In Your Workouts

If you live by the motto "no pain, no gain," or you frequently exclaim that your HIIT circuits "hurt so good," you're probably the type of person who challenges yourself to the max during your workouts. And while this isn't necessarily a bad thing, i…
By Georgina Berbari

I Tried Vegan "Spacepaste" & It Looks Like Straight-Up LED Lights On Your Face

As you might have noticed, 2018 is the year for glitter. So many brands have been releasing shining, shimmering formulations like they're going out of style. We're not even halfway through February, and Lemonhead LA has already launched the best glit…
By Kim Carpluk

These "Awkward" Proposal Stories Show There's No One Perfect Way To Get Engaged

There are a few adjectives people use to describe proposal stories that tend to be a bit more common than the rest. You know what I mean. How many times have you heard someone describe their marriage proposal as "magical" or "romantic" or — my person…
By Candice Jalili

This $20 Toy Simulates Pimple Popping, So You Can Save Your Face (But Still Lose Your Dignity)

As a self-proclaimed popaholic, I am not ashamed to admit that I love watching pimple popping and blackhead extraction videos. Call me gross, but I find it immensely therapeutic and satisfying. To all of my fellow weirdos, we’ve been blessed with a n…
By Ariana Marsh

Everyone Is So Thirsty Over This “Photo” Of Obama With Facial Hair

It's been a hot minute since President Barack Obama left the Oval office (though it feels like ages), and a lot of us miss him dearly. After leaving the White House, the 44th president remained out of the public eye for a little while, decompressing …
By Daniella Bondar

Meghan Markle Uses This $13 Natural Wonder To Grow Her Eyebrows Back & You Can Too

Meghan Markle is the world's new go-to celebrity for all things fashion and beauty — she's marrying a prince after all, so she must have some tricks up her sleeve. Meghan Markle's beauty routine is just as intricate as mine, because that's how real s…
By Alison Turka

7 Foolproof Things To Do Every Day If You're Tired Of Being Lazy AF

Being lazy can be oh-so-lovely. Until you start letting life pass you by, and not living to your full potential, then suddenly, it's not so good anymore. Don't get me wrong, I love my weekends when I can stay snuggled up in bed just a bit longer. Hit…
By Marisa Casciano

This Is How Long Most People Wait To Say "I Love You," Science Says

If I had to choose one word to describe saying "I love you" to your partner for the first time, I'd have to go with... hmm, exciting? Nope. Thrilling? Hardly. Terrifying? YES. Exactly. Saying "I love you" for the first time is terrifying. What makes …
By Candice Jalili

6 Reasons To Travel Abroad With Your Boyfriend Or Girlfriend In Your 20s

Traveling can be many things: hectic, expensive, and definitely stressful. But with the right people or person beside you, all those troubles kind of just melt away. That's why there are some solid reasons to travel abroad with your boyfriend or girl…
By Alani Vargas

7 Subtle Red Flags About The Way The Person You're Dating Treats Other People

You've done it. Against all odds, you've found the seemingly perfect person. All of your dates have been amazing, filled with endless hours of deep conversation and sweet affections. And how is it possible that you have, like, everything in common? T…
By Lily Rouff

Opal Hair Is The Latest Color Trend & It's So 'Zenon: Girl Of The 21st Century'

If you were a fan of the unicorn highlighters or mermaid hair hues that took over 2017, then you’re in for a treat. A new beauty trend has arisen and it's as fantastical as it gets. These photos of opal hair color prove that too much rainbow is never…
By Ariana Marsh