OK, lovely ladies, before you find yourself painfully offended and reeling at the seemingly sexist title of this article, please grant me a quick opportunity to entice you with a simple review of what I mean when I use the term “crazy.” See, my intentions on this glorious day are to boldly reclaim the word “crazy.”
I wish to release it from the ever-constraining shackles of negativity and take the word “crazy” back from the epically dull, mindless sheep who collectively branded us “crazy” to begin with.
Let me provide you with a bit of backstory: See, I’m a girl who has been called “crazy” more times than I care to count on both of my cocktail-ring adorned hands, and it used to piss me the f*ck off.
Through the oh-so-easily jilted lens in which my younger self viewed this complicated world, “crazy” was a word that oozed with negativity.
Until I realized that if thinking for myself and rejecting society’s notion of what happiness is supposed to look like makes me “crazy”— I’ll happily take it.
There are so many fabulous “crazy girls” who stifle their inner-crazy because they’re terrified that if they dare to reveal their true crazy-girl colors, they will be written off as unattractive to men.
That their fate will be diminished to that of a lone spinster with only her collection of 63 kittens written into her will. This couldn't be further from the truth.
So what is it, exactly, about crazy girls that make us the best partners you will ever have (and never forget)?
1. We love with a reckless abandon.
We crazy girls love with our whole, bare hearts. If we so choose to get wed, we are the girls who will marry you for the right reasons.
The very idea of being with someone based on the superficial notions of “appearances” and “financial security” is utterly insane to us.
We don’t have preconceived perceptions about the gender or race or class of the person we're supposed to "fall in love" with. We are literally colorblind and just know that when we feel it, we feel it.
We don't associate love with fear or conditions. We fall into you quickly and heedlessly. We are PROUD to love you, whomever you are, wherever you come from, whatever you look like.
2. We are bold and explorative in the bedroom.
Society often deems a girl crazy merely because she openly loves sex. Now, if you could choose between a girl who is afraid to own her sexuality and a girl who want to have mind-blowing sex with you all the of time, you would choose the latter right?
See we crazy girls are wildly sexual, and our urge to constantly try new, exciting things most definitely bleeds into our sex lives.
We channel our die-hard creativity and unapologetically HOT desires into the bedroom.
We’re eager to get down and dirty, and we want to experiment with it ALL: role playing, bondage, sex in public and other freaky things only “perfect” girls get to read about in books. Let us turn your fantasy into reality, babe.
3. We will take you on magical adventures.
Crazy girls universally suffer from a condition commonly referred to in the medical community as “Wanderlust,” a specific attraction that triggers an irrepressible need to constantly travel.
We can’t sit still and pretty in one place for too long, so we are constantly scheming about what gorgeous, exotic location we will travel to next.
We are so very different than the girl who is hopelessly trapped in an endless dream of a far-away vacation she will never muster up the funds NOR the courage to take.
Crazy girls make their dreams come into fruition, for we are the DO-ers of this fine planet who will take you on wild adventures to fantastical places you can’t pronounce and didn’t even know existed.
4. We have killer style.
Crazy girls are true artists (even if our medium is simply our colorful lives), and our visual mastery is always displayed creatively on our bodies.
We admire the eclectic styles we keenly observe from our incessant globe-trotting and have the creative vision to pair an Indian sari with unexpected mega platforms bought on the streets of Tokyo (and look f*cking fabulous doing so). We love to draw inspiration from other crazy girls, but we always make it our own.
We are fierce forces of fashion nature, who will rip strategically-placed holes into a preppy cable knit sweater only to have our look carbon-copied and mass produced at the local H&M a year later.
The irony is this: The very girls who had the audacity to sneer at us for our out-of-the-box fashion risks, are NOW trotting around the city in our original creations thinking they're so cool (cough basic).
All of the great fashionistas throughout herstory have been fabulous, forward-thinking “crazy" girls: Brigitte Bardot, Diana Vreeland, Edie Sedgwick, Kate Moss, Lana Del Rey and even current "it" girl Cara Delevingne.
We are an ornate and fascinating breed of human to gaze at. We offer visual stimulation to the world at large, and dating us will add the general beauty of your life.
5. We always have the ticket to fabulous parties.
Crazy girls know how to have a good time, and our infectious energy serves as the very heartbeat of every and any party.
Because of this rare, infectious trait, we are consistently invited to all the best events (especially weddings), for everyone knows it’s simply no PARTY, without at least two to five crazy girls in attendance.
We are the girls at the party who un-self-consciously dance the night away on the chrome tables tops, fearlessly making the wittiest and most memorable toasts after engaging in a controversial political debate with a celebrity (who tend to be enthralled by us. Maybe "notorious" is far more interesting than "famous"?).
If you embark on a love affair with a crazy girl, expect your social life to get a hell of a lot more interesting.
Important To Note: A crazy girl doesn’t discriminate against anything, parties included.
Don't be surprised if you find yourself in a dirty dive bar in the company of bikers on a Tuesday, being showered with sparkles and lipstick at a seriously fabulous drag show on a Thursday AND at glamorous black-tie event honoring Victoria, Crown Princess of Sweden on a Saturday.
As long as it doesn't fall somewhere boringly in the middle, we're game.
6. We are kind creatures.
Contrary to popular belief, the very essence of a crazy girl lies in her natural, soulful kindness.
In this cold world, there are thousands of ruthless bullying girls, who pose as crazy girls -- giving us a bad rep. Recognize them for what they are: EVIL girls. Dismiss them and never associate them with us.
Herein lies the difference: A crazy girl is extremely sensitive to energy, and therefore is hyper-keyed in to the feelings of those around her.
She absorbs the sadness, anxieties and traumatic memories of those around her. Because of her extreme empathy, she can't morally add to the very real pain of those who surround her. A crazy girl also never lies; it's against her set of remarkably high morals.
In fact, it's in the very nature of a crazy girl to take lost souls under her protective wing and show them the light.
The real beauty of dating a crazy girl is that she attains the incredible ability to heal your wounds before they turn into scars.