Relationships

Why Getting What You Want Begins With Believing You're Worth It

by Samer Sweidan
Stocksy

You've been there before.

You can't really sleep, but somehow, you have energy. You can't think about anyone else, but you manage to pull through the day.

Your very happiness becomes a function of the actions and words of the special person who took your breath away just the night before.

And, when it works out, you experience an elevated state of euphoria that’s unparalleled and reserved only for those special moments when two halves of the same thing come together as one.

But, what if you put your best foot forward, open all the doors, pull out all the seats and express yourself honestly and openly with the person you like, and it leads to nothing?

You might be tempted to question your methods, words and overall approach. You’ll think back to something you said or did, trying to find the reason why you couldn’t make things work.

In reality, a connection wasn’t made — not because of something you said or did, but rather, because the fit wasn’t mutual and you weren’t meant to be together.

And, as hard as it might be to realize it then and there, it’s best to end things early on rather than to endure an ill-fitted match that leads to an experience mired in unnecessary drama and disappointment.

The truth is, a lot of people don’t necessarily know what they want, let alone what’s good for them. Not everyone is successful at achieving an equitable balance that ensures professional and personal success.

Even worse, not enough people recognize the importance of having a partner by their side who can fuel their success in life — the type of partner who can be understanding, patient, open, encouraging and unwavering in his or her belief in you.

That’s what you deserve, and you have to believe, in your heart, it’s possible. Never compromise that vision; it’s worth the wait.

But, still, you must understand people have different priorities and personal situations. Some of us are better than others at balancing multiple priorities.

Moreover, some of us have familial and social situations that add complications to pursuing new relationships.

While you may not know it, the failure of your approach could have been a function of those hidden dynamics. And, that’s another reason not take things personally.

You can only do so much to make something work, and past a certain point, you have to be honest with yourself and acknowledge it’s time to move on.

You’ll find a way to do so, as hard it might be at that particular moment. You’re resilient and your experience has made you wiser.

Don’t let this particular experience make you bitter or bring you down. Allow it to make you better and bring you up. Don’t feel animosity or hate.

Accept him or her as you would a friend, and work on making the relationship a positive one, in spite of its platonic nature.

When you think you’ve found something special, keep the communication lines open and approach it with an open mind. Allow it the opportunity to be tested and be patient.

Things don’t always work out right away, and this is when you need to be grounded in your thinking, as hard as that might be when emotions run high.

Good things take time, and strong foundations aren’t necessarily born overnight. You have to get to know someone and he or she has to get to know you.

You want to achieve a state of mutual admiration and respect that gives way to an honest attempt at making things work, should you believe in what it could be.

You’ll find each other eventually, but only if you believe it.