This week we have Jenny* who finally got the chance to hook up with her college crush... only to really colossally ruin her chances at a second hook up:
Backstory: I'm 23 years old, single AF and in college.
I was in a dry spell for almost nine months. However, that went away when I hooked up with my classmate Alex* a month ago, who I had a crush on since last semester. This was not planned at all! I was originally going to hook up with my ex that same night since he was in town. (Sounds bad, I know, but hey, girls have needs, too.) BUT that didn't happen. But anyway, let's begin: So after a stressful week of school, my two friends (Sally and Court) and I decided to go get a 'few' drinks on a Thursday night.
9 pm: My friends and I meet up at Applebee's and start drinking.
While we were drinking, my ex texted me and told me he was in town. I told my friends, 'OMG, this is my chance to hook up with him.'
They, being the amazing friends that they are, totally encouraged me to hook up with him. I told him to come over my place after I was done drinking, and he said 'OK,' and I was super excited about that. So by 11 pm, we were buzzing and decided to head to the bar where all the college students hang out on Thursday nights.
11:30 pm: We get to the bar.
Turns out, I didn't have my driver's license on me, and I figured I left it at Applebee's. We drove back, but it wasn't there. I still have no idea how I lost it. (I had to order a new DL after that night.) Anyway, my friend Court had her friend's ID and let me use it to get in — and it worked! We finally got in around 12 am.
12:45 am: I have had one too many shots of tequila at this point.
Apparently, I told a guy it was my birthday, and he bought me shots! Then, I saw my crush, Alex, at the bar. Unfortunately, he was with a few other girls, and I told my friend Sally that it was upsetting seeing him with those girls.
1:15 am: We are almost leaving the bar.
On our way out, Sally decided to go up to Jake and say, “Hey, my friend has thought you were cute since last semester. You should go introduce yourself to her.” (She couldn't have kept it simple and just said I thought he was cute. She had to say 'since last semester.') Anyway, he introduced himself to me and said I look cute. We were getting along well, and out of nowhere, we started making out.
2:00 am: We finally leave the bar.
I asked Alex to drive my car because I was too drunk to drive. I had totally forgotten about my ex, but then, he called me to ask if I was on my way home. I told him I was, but I lied. I was on my way to Alex's apartment. Finally, we got to his place and hooked up.
3:20 am: I leave his apartment.
My ex had texted me again asking if I was still out, so I told him we had ended up going to my friend's apartment and that I was on my way home for real this time. But my ex didn't come over that night after all because I fell asleep.
THE NEXT MORNING: I wake up thinking, "OMG. Did I really just hook up with Alex?"
I immediately texted my friends to tell them! I looked in my contacts to see if we exchanged numbers, but I guess I was so caught up in the moment, I didn't bother to give him my number or ask for his. BTW, I was STILL drunk the next morning, but I went to work and left after 30 minutes.
Anyway, things started to go downhill not longer after this.
MONDAY, 9:30 am: I see him at school.
We did not say one word to each other! I was kind of upset, but then, I thought, maybe he just feels awkward about the situation because we were both drunk and what not.
7:00 pm: I get home and do some investigating.
I decide to check my front door camera to see exactly what time I got home that night. As I watched the video of me, it looked like I had NO PANTS ON! At that moment, I was like, 'OMFG! No wonder he didn't want to talk to me in class! I left his house with NO pants on!' So I found a way to get his phone number, and I called him. Unfortunately, he didn't answer, so I texted him and asked him to call me when he had a chance.
9:30 pm: He calls me two hours later.
We talked on the phone for about 20 minutes, and I apologized for being so drunk and asked if I did anything embarrassing. He said no, that I was good and had nothing to worry about. I also asked him if I left without pants, and he laughed and said, 'I'm pretty sure you had your pants on. I wouldn't have let you leave without them.' I was relieved! He also asked me if I got home OK. I said I did, and he said, 'I had offered to drive you home, and you said yes, but then, you changed your mind and told me to fuck off.' I was so embarrassed I did that because I didn't remember that at all! So I apologized again, and we finally got off the phone. Because we had a good convo I figured everything was cool with us and that there was no need for awkwardness at school.
WEDNESDAY, 9:30 am: I have classes with him again.
I assumed he was going to acknowledge me. WRONG! He literally walked right past me before our second class without making eye contact! I tried to get his attention, but I got nothing!
12:30 pm: I decide to text him.
The text read, 'Damn was it [the sex] that bad? I tried saying hi to you earlier, but you just walked passed me.'
2:30 pm: I'm still waiting for a response.
By this point, there was still no reply, and I was so embarrassed that I texted him.
3:30 pm: I go to happy hour.
Sally and I decided to go to happy hour, and I got a bit drunk.
5:30 pm: I go to my evening class kind of drunk.
He never replied.
7:00 pm: Drunk texts are being sent.
I went to drink some more with Court, and I got even more drunk. I told her to text Alex off her phone because MAYBE he didn't get my text. She sent him a message saying, 'Hey!' and he replied in like two seconds with, 'Hey who's this?' Court and I were like WTF!!!!! He did get my message, but he ignored it!! We replied with my name, so he replied saying, 'Hey.' We replied, 'Did you not get my message earlier?' At this point, I sound desperate AF but continue to make things worse. He didn't respond to that, so we double texted him, saying, 'I hope you don't think I want anything to do with you like that because I don't.'
7:10 pm: NO REPLY.
So I was already more drunk than I was earlier, and I told my friend to TRIPLE text him, saying, 'Honestly, I just wanted to fuck again.' AND SHE FUCKING SENT IT! Of course, then, I realized that was a HORRIBLE idea because, now, I just sound fucking crazy.
9:30 pm: HE NEVER REPLIES, AND I HAVE CLASSES WITH HIM THE REST OF THE SEMESTER.
To make things even worse, we have the same major AND we're in the same grade, so I'm going to see him until we graduate. I WANTED TO DIE MONDAY WHEN I HAD TO SEE HIM AGAIN AFTER SENDING THOSE MESSAGES! Now, a month later, the situation is hilarious, and I can't believe I did all that extra shit, and he didn't ever bother to respond to my messages. My guy friends said I came off too strong, and I definitely learned my lesson! I should have just hooked up with my ex and saved myself the embarrassment.
So all in all, that night, I lost my DL, my credit card, my jacket AND my DIGNITY.
OK, this story is awesome for a few reasons.
First of all, she literally lived out all of our worst nightmares. Like, seriously, if you're feeling a little crazy in front of your crush, just read this! It'll ease all your worries right away! You can't possibly be worse than this!
Second, I love that she just DGAF about it. Yes, she acknowledges that she completely lost her cool, but she's accepted it, learned her lesson and is willing to LOL about it.
Take notes, ladies.
*Names have been changed.