You guys, it's a jungle out there.
The competition for a mate is fierce, and we are much stronger together if we travel in packs. Because together, you can hunt down the perfect partner for the whole pride.
So how amazing is it when you have a best friend as a wing woman you can always rely on? And it's even better if YOU can BE that friend.
Here are a few ways to be the best wing woman your best friend could ask for:
Don't force her to do anything.
Remember, you're there to lift her up, not make her uncomfortable.
Of course, sometimes, everyone needs a little nudge, but as her bestie, you'll know if she's put on all the breaks and is shutting down.
Read the signs and don't strong arm her into being someone she isn't. If she doesn't want to do the body shot off the sexy bartender's abs, don't make her.
In fact, why don't you do it and see if he has any friends more her speed who ARE wearing their shirts?
Your role is just as much about being a mother hen as it is about being her wing woman.
Carry the embarrassment if you need to.
This is an all-inclusive rule, meaning if at any point anything is awkward or becomes awkward, you lie down in front of her to take the brunt of it.
If a conversation with a sexy stranger starts to go south, figure out how you can DISTRACT. Or maybe approaching the potential man of her dreams is the awkward part, so you gotta go do it for her.
Whatever lengths you need to go through to get this guy's attention on your main girl and keep it there, go all in.
Remember, the night is about her.
Don't talk about yourself. Don't talk about yourself. Don't talk about yourself.
Don't flirt with the hot guy you were supposed to be introducing her to, and don't talk about yourself.
It can be tricky to separate yourself from the nightlife, but remember, you're there for your best friend, NOT for any personal eye candy.
Pick a few key talking points on your favorite things about her to have at the ready, and bring a list of her favorite jams to pass on to the DJ. Order her that drink that always loosens her up or that you defaulted to in college.
However you can ensure she glows all night, do. That. Thing!
Get the F outta there when it's time.
Total success? She's hitting it off with a major hottie? Girl, bye. That's your cue.
Don't linger, and try to remember she's a big girl. Nothing is worse than a third wheel getting in the way of real chemistry!
Be sure to say to her in front of the guy, "Call me when you're home" or even "See you at home," so he knows someone will be looking for her later in the evening. Then, get the heck outta there... even if that just means to the other side of the bar where you can keep your loving and protective best friend eyes on her.
Bonus: If this all works out, guess who's maid of honor at the wedding? YOU ARE, GURL.
And never forget, if you want to be my* lover, you gotta get with my* friends.
*my best friend's *her friends, AKA me