As the saying goes, "There's a silver lining in every cloud."
For the most part, I usually think of my perpetual singledom as a bad thing, but sometimes when the air is just right, I get in a reflective mood. It's a mood where I see the bright side of everything. One advantage I think I have over my more romantically functional friends is I don't have an ex … and it's glorious!
Here are a few reasons why:
1. No gut-wrenching social media posts
Can we all agree on something? Facebook reminders are the worst. They should be renamed “reminder of a time in your life when you were happier.” If pictures of dead relatives and pets weren't bad enough, the fine folks at Facebook love to remind you that the former love of your life is now just a bittersweet memory.
A filter feature has since been added to allow the blocking of certain people, but we all know the temptation of social media stalking looms large. I don't have such problems; I can cruise through my timeline with a clear heart and conscious, the way Mark Zuckerberg and those guys he allegedly stole Facebook from intended to.
2. No avoiding people
I can't tell you how many people I know who are actively avoiding a run in with their ex. The number isn't high, I just have a bad memory… but seriously, it's really too many. It feels so good not to constantly be looking over my shoulder, or not going to my favorite pizzeria, just because I may run into a former partner. It's better than sex … well, at least it's better than bad sex.
3. No Comparison
Like Taylor Swift, I have a blank space ... but alas, I have no name to write. But we're looking on the bright side here — or at least we're trying to. One good thing about not having an ex lies in the future.
Whenever I do start talking to someone, I won't have the cloud ex hanging over me, no one to pit my new lover against. I'll never say, “I wish she dressed like my ex”; “I wish she smiled like my ex”; “I wish she crafted well thought out 'Game of Thrones' fan theories like my ex.”
See, once we start comparing old loves with new loves, the slope becomes very slippery. But on the real, I would love to go out with a woman who has some good "Game of Thrones" fan theories. I need something to pass the time now that season 7 is delayed.
4. No Scar Tissue
It's no secret. Having an ex can be emotionally damaging. The Red Hot Chili Peppers were right as far as breakups go; it's a lonely view. Unfortunately in this life, most suffer the pain of failed love. It's simply the name of the game.
Not having an ex means that I am a blank slate — free of emotional damage… well, “ex” related emotional damage. I'm emotionally damaged… but for other reasons... hey, at least it's not from a former love… I'm trying to look at the bright side here, help me out.
5. No Bad Habits
Unless you're Apollo Creed, bad habits are hard to break. When you have an ex, sometimes their bad habits rub off on you. Whether it's smoking, excessive drinking or even worse: cynicism.
As humans, it's often easier for a person's bad qualities to rub off on us rather than their righteous ones. When you don't have an ex, all your bad qualities are organic and homemade! The way nature intended! It's like the Whole Foods of emotions.