Is your partner right for you? The answer is never simple or clear-cut. Each person has their own strengths and weaknesses, but weighing them down will not get you to the right answer.
But I've come up with a list of questions that will point you in the right direction. If most of your answers are “yes,” you've got a keeper.
1. Is your partner listening to you?
When your partner listens to you, it doesn't mean they have to mold to your wishes. Listening to your significant other also doesn't mean dying to hear the latest sports results or magazine headlines.
A partner who cares about you wants to hear what really matters to you. They want to know why you are down and how they can make you happy. They're interested in your judgment, opinions and beliefs. This is especially true when it comes to the serious things the both you have to deal with.
Overall, the latest gossip or news piece might slip by your partner's ear, but you should be the first person asked for an opinion when it comes to crucial decisions.
2. Is your partner there for you?
You will only know the true loyalty and affection of your friends when you really need them. The same equation works with your partner.
A person who will be by your side, always, through hardship, sickness, sadness or whatever else life decides to throw at you.
Just like everyone else, your partner may have his own worries to deal with, a demanding life, a challenging career or family issues, but if he really cares about you, they will offer his help and support unconditionally just when you need it the most.
They might not be by your side when you get your tattoo done or cry at a movie, but when you get a serious cold, who is the first one to bring you chicken soup? Who is the first person to cheer you up when you're depressed? And finally, who is there to help you with advice when you need it the most?
If your partner is there when you really need them, remember that it's OK to forget about the things that aren't as important.
3. Is your partner showing respect?
Respect comes in many forms. It's in the way you talk to each other and in the way you speak about each other to your friends. It's in the way you listen to the things one cares about. It's in the way one manages their time and attention with you. It's also evident from their actions and attitude towards you.
However, respect is very subjective. Only you can truly judge this correctly. If you feel disrespected, then you probably are.
But if your partner offers you respect, you will probably feel it.
4. Is your partner showing appreciation?
Similar to respect, appreciation is again subjective. Some people are vocal about it while others show it. Many partners believe it is already implied through their presence, attention and affection.
This is especially true in long-term relationships because the majority of us tend to forget the significance of vocalizing our appreciation for the other. Even simple words like “thank you” seem unnecessary once familiarity settles in. Still, this doesn't mean that appreciation is no longer there, but rather that it has taken different forms.
A simple everyday life example of showing appreciation is when your partner comes home with your favorite snack or beverage without having asked for it beforehand.
5. Is your partner supportive?
A meaningful relationship is all about offering support to one another.
Your partner should inspire you to become a better individual because of their belief in you as a person, as a partner and in your potential to improve.
The supportive partner trusts in your loyalty, judgment and your feelings. They are supportive of your work and passions. But probably the biggest show of support is entrusting years of their life with you because they truly believe you can make them happy and, in turn, support them to become a better version of themselves.
A positive answer for most of these questions shows that the person you have in your life is actually the person you want to have in your life.
Want more awesome advice? Visit my blog HisDesires.com, get my free eBook and learn exactly how to meet and keep a quality guy in your life. A previous version of this article appeared on my blog.