7 Things That I. Literally. Can't. Even. With. When It Comes To Making Plans
Making plans has got to be one of the most difficult and stressful things in a young 20-something's life. The larger the party you are trying to coordinate with, the more opinions are thrown in the mix -- and stress is always the inevitable result.
At that point in time, you question why the hell you even attempted to make these plans in the first place since you are beyond exhausted and the only thing you want to do is curl up with Netflix.
But if you don't make plans, how are you going to socialize? And thus, the dilemma is born. The stressors just seem to pile up the deeper you delve into these plans. How do you get from point A to B? Who is invited? Who picks the place? Damn, I'm already F'ed up.
But what are those specific things you just can't deal with when making plans? Well, let's see if you agree with me here...
1. Group Texts
The fact that you can have 10+ people in one string of messages is just a recipe for disaster. Who the hell has time or patience for their phones to vibrate every five minutes throughout an entire day?
The worst is when the participants stray off topic, divulging the activities of their own days, which no one actually cares about.
Or, when one person has a conversation that only applies to one other person; go have a private conversation and stop wasting my precious battery.
I mean how am I going to listen to Spotify and scroll through Instagram on my walk home if your unnecessary conversations are draining my battery all day long?
"But I don't care where we eat!" Yes, you f*cking do because you just shot down every restaurant I threw out there. Take your fake Gluten Vegetarian Religious food restrictions elsewhere because this group of 12 girls does not have time for that.
"But I don't care what time!" Yes, you do because you apparently have a schedule busier than Beyoncé and can only meet at the most inconvenient time for me. I mean who wants to go to dinner at 6:00 pm on a Friday night?
Trying to make plans with people who can't make up their f*cking minds is probably the most infuriating part of the process. They claim they don't care what option is chosen until you've basically finalized your plans.
Then, suddenly, they realize they actually do care and, as a result, become the most annoying version of themselves. And just like that, you vow to kick them out of your future bachelorette party because once again... ain't nobody got time for that.
Anytime someone asks me, "Who will be there?" that person is officially uninvited to any and all plans. Why the hell would I invite you to come somewhere if you wouldn't like the company that would be around?
No, seriously, why do people actually ask this question? Will this really deter you from going somewhere you want to go? If the answer is yes, you need a harsh reality check and a severe boost of self-esteem.
And if you are still asking people "What are you wearing?" after you graduate from college, you really need a dose of reality because the answer to that question will always be: jeans and a cute top. EVERY TIME (even if it's a lie).
So, seriously, stop asking stupid questions that you already know the answer to and use that valuable time to hit the gym or take a nap.
4. When people bring their significant others without notice
Oh, was that just a given that your boyfriend was invited? Don't you think you should have said something so that the single folk could hit up our guy friends to pose as our boyfriends so as not to feel left out?
How are we supposed to feel comfortable talking about the guy who left our apartment the other morning after a one-night stand while your "mature" 28-year-old boyfriend is sitting there and judging?
Now there is no way he's going to set any of us up with his roommate's cousin's girlfriend's hot brother. So selfish.
For some reason, it seems like everyone's social life revolves around someone's birthday. Newsflash: Everyone has one. I don't care that you are turning 24, but I do care that you are forcing me to drop $97 on a brunch, a dinner and bar tab.
The birthday girl basically forces you to rearrange your schedule so that you are available to give her all of your unnecessary attention. It doesn't matter what age this person is turning because the celebration will be just as important as if it were her 21st birthday.
Was my #PicStitch seriously not enough love for you? I really have to spend all weekend at your beck and call? Ugh.
6. Group Dinners
Do you split the bill evenly or does everyone pay for what they got individually? This question is as old as time because there's always that one person whose meal was .47 cents less than everyone else's who demands everyone pays for what she ordered.
This person should never, ever be invited to a group meal ever again.
We're all broke in this group lady, you aren't special because you spotted the cheapest thing on the menu. Throw your blue Chase debit card in the pile and the shut the hell up and don't think you're getting out of the tip.
There is one reason, and one reason only, as to why making plans is so annoying and stressful -- and that reason is: people. The more people you include in plans, the more opinions you have to take into consideration.
Not everyone you know is a rational human being, which is why this process essentially sucks.
Each person in a group of friends plays a designated role and those roles become extremely apparently when making plans is the task. There is always that one person who lives her life by the motto: My way or the highway. All this does is make you actually want to throw her on a highway and let her fend for herself.
Then there is the organizer who tries to balance everyone's opinion and ends up making the executive decision since no one else can even seem to handle it. Typically these two people clash and end up sitting or standing as far away from each other as possible.
Aren't you glad you decided to go out rather than stay in?