My last New Year's Eve kiss was years ago and it was bullsh*t.
Though the details are a little fuzzy due to all the champagne, I do remember it was lackluster at best.
You may have noted my current single status, so it's clear we didn't last.
Since kissing is arguably more intimate than sex, a New Year's Eve smooch is important.
I firmly believe the chemistry of a kiss doesn't cloud judgement the way a sexual romp can. It says everything you'll know about love in 2016, whether that's heartbreak or a long-lasting affair.
Until I find that foot-popping New Year's Eve kiss, I'll be showering my girls with smooches when the ball drops.
If you're wondering about your relationship status in the new year, pucker up. Let your ball drop kiss predict the future better than a Magic 8 Ball.
The short but sweet kiss.
A short smooch indicates your crush wants to keep things light. He may like you right now, but don't expect to hold his attention forever.
Your relationship may be more than a fling, but it certainly won't be a full-on affair.
The peck on the cheek.
You're just friends.
The sooner you accept it, the sooner you'll have a real date to your friend's New Year's Eve party in 2016.
The kiss with a random guy in the bar.
If you're single, find yourself a hot rando.
Your relationship won’t last beyond the night, but you can still have fun.
The french kiss that leads to sex.
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You're both too wrapped up in the kiss to care who's watching.
One more slight tug at his belt and you two may need to get a room.
The year will most likely be full of these hot and heavy moments. But, make sure you two are actually getting to know each another.
The forced kiss that's overly aggressive.
You'll want to back away from this one.
If he's too hungry for your kisses, he may be the jealous type. You two will be over before Groundhog Day.
The kiss you basically begged him to give you in public.
New Year's Eve should be the exception to any anti-PDA rules.
He may stick around long enough to propose, but you'll be dragging him to the alter.
The first kiss you've waited two dates for.
If your first smooch lands on a night as meaningful as this one, you two will last well into the summertime.
The possibility of love is more magical than a trip Disneyland.
The pity kiss with the friend zone guy.
You're out of his league and he knows it. Though you're trying to keep your pity kiss quick, he attempts to let it linger.
In 2016, you two will be lucky if you're even still friends.
The awkward kiss you just can't get right.
Which way should I turn my head? Are your lips cold? Does your tongue taste like wine?
You'll be overthinking the relationship so much, you'll be lucky if you two make it to spring.
The PDA-perfect kiss captured by your family and friends.
They'll never have to guess whether you two are in a relationship. Your Instagram will still be littered with #MCM posts in 2016.
The loving kiss that ends with a genuine smile.
You're so happy, you feel your heart might explode.
Go ahead, celebrate!
You can look forward to an encore NYE kiss by 2017.