Hell hath no fury like a mother scorned. And that's exactly what the New York Times did earlier this week when it published a style feature titled “Mom Hair: It Exists. Now What To Do About It.”
The trend piece, written by Bee Shapiro, delved into the phenomenon of “mom hair,” an angled cut many women get during postpartum hair loss (oh yeah, that's a real thing). Instead of feeling modern, Schapiro says the bob comes off as “mumsy” and “frumpy.”
Then, stylist Juan Carlos Maciques recommends expecting moms start planning for their hair during the third trimester. See also: slightly-too-short bangs to add youthful joie de vivre. Or, you know, to look like your baby cut them.
In short, the article was so snobbish it seemed like a parody. The moms of the internet — particularly the ones who write for a living — weren't pleased. Keyboards tapping like a furious army of childbearing bees, they used social media to express the many ways the Times had misplaced its priorities.
Giving birth to a living, defenseless human is exhausting, but don't forget to call your salon ahead of time.
Cultural critics also pointed to the use of “mom” as an adjective to make something seem outdated or dowdy. The same treatment has also been applied to jeans and, as Slate's Michelle Goldberg tersely notes, porn.
Some moms laughed about the idiocy of placing a good haircut over a child's wellbeing.
Others pointed out moms have to focus on finding themselves again after giving birth, whether that's in a career or at home.
The piece reminds me of a recent "SNL" sketch involving host Brie Larson. She's about to get mom hair and transform into a Marshalls-shopping, seashell-soap-loving mama.
Plus, as many a commentator pointed out, there are more mothers in this world than white ladies with straight hair.
Take note, beauty writers: This is why you don't mess with the mom squad.