Is He Worth Your Time?: How To Tell If You're Dealing With A Man Or A Man-Child
Women in the 21st century have had a major social makeover and it is without a doubt that our roles have been redefined.
We’ve been forced to adhere to the social norms and we kind of like it. We are now making our own money, buying our own homes and paying for our own vehicles without the help of our significant others.
In more ways than one, this has made us stronger than ever. It has given us more opportunities than before and we are welcoming it with open arms. This division of power has presented us with a certain type of independence, and with that independence comes more options.
We are aware that we’re onto a something great, but sometimes a little thing called love gets in the way. As much as we’re killing it at work or in our personal lives, it’s comforting to have a companion to share our experiences, fears and to just have fun with.
As we all know, finding a good man out there is tough, and we sometimes ignore the red flags. I am here to point them out to you. I wouldn’t want to see you waste anymore of your precious time when you could be slowly taking over the world.
So here are couple of scenarios that will help you tell the difference between the boy you’re seeing and the man you want.
Scenario 1: He wants to go on a date with you.
Okay, so you met him at a random party or at work or wherever. His next steps are crucial. If he has a date and time, great! This means he has learned something on his journey of manhood. (Bonus points if he has a place picked out.)
A boy, on the other hand, will arrange for you to a meet at a party that his friends have organized or something equally as casual.
That’s the first date and that’s where the bar is set. If this is what you want, then what you want is not a man but a boy who is going to toy with your heart.
Scenario 2: His ex contacts him.
You’ve ignored his early behaviors because he is just so cute and charming, but when sh*t hits the fan, it might be too late for you to dig out your heart and think clearly. When his ex is blowing up his phone, email and Facebook, watch how he reacts. The boy will try to keep it a secret but will constantly engage himself in a game of cat and mouse all while in your company.
This is not where you want to be. Politely excuse yourself and never see him again. A man will be honest. He will tell you straight up if it's something or nothing.
Both give you a fair chance to see the situation for what it is. Be smart and know your worth.
Scenario 3: How much effort he puts into maintaining contact.
This one is a bit tricky because of multiple things out of our control, but you'll usually have a notion. Intuition should be a good friend that you confide in. If he is making you come to him in the beginning, it's a sign he isn’t investing much. This is your cue to pull back.
If he is a man about it, he will tell you outright if it is working for him either vocally or through his actions. Be on your toes because nobody has time to waste. If he tells you his intentions or shows you, believe him. This is not the time to be ignoring the little things.
A boy will keep the conversation dangling just enough to be able to contact you when he wants. He will call you when it is convenient for him. Don’t let him have that much control over your life.
It really all has to do with where his priorities lie. A man will be solid in more ways than one. If you’re the type to learn the hard way, you run the risk of never learning.
Take heed, ladies, it’s a tough world out there and we need to have each other’s back!
Photo Courtesy: We Heart It