RIP, this guy's joy.
Lap dances are great. They're probably the closest things to sex you can do that don't involve bodily fluids. In fact, it's this lack of bodily fluid transference that gives lap dances their biggest advantage to actual sex stuff.
There is also a social aspect to a lap dance. I've never crunched the numbers, but I think 45 percent of all important meetings in “The Sopranos” happened while Tony Soprano was getting a lap dance at the Bada Bing!
Having a lady do naked stuff on your clothed body while you sit within talking distance of some friends with your favorite R&B hits playing in the background? Sounds like a good time to me!
Too bad that simple joy was ruined for this poor man, thanks to Lana Del Rey and a culture built upon YouTube video tutorials.