Down Bad

Beware The Situationship That Derails Your Life Out Of Nowhere

So much for those plans to be unattached and unbothered.

Emma Chao/Elite Daily; Stocksy/Getty Images

TikTok has already declared that this shall be the summer of singles. That means instead of prioritizing finding “the one,” it’s time to have fun riding solo to parties, beach days, and even vacays. Of course, a proper single girl summer can still involve date nights and flirty texts, but no serious entanglements — even a situationship.

An undefined hookup can put a real damper on those easygoing goals if you’re not careful. That’s what these hopefuls realized when their flings turned into major disappointments. As the saying goes, “you should be catching flights and not feelings,” but even while overseas, you can experience heartbreak. While the goal may have been to keep things cool and casual with your FWB, an unfortunate case of falling in love too quickly can arrive instead of the perfect tan.

In these as-told-tos, Elite Daily readers share their most upsetting and shocking situationship-turned-wrong stories, and the major lessons they learned along the way. If you want to avoid ruining your summer of fun, take notes.

I Traveled To Europe & Was Ghosted 2 Weeks In

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This guy and I started seeing each other in early June, and he knew I was traveling at the end of July for a month. That didn’t seem to be an issue to him, so we saw each other three times a week, spoke every day, and started to really like each other.

My trip came, and everything was normal for the first two weeks, until suddenly I didn’t hear from him for three days. I checked in and he assured me everything was fine — only for me to never hear from him again.

I started to resent myself for ruining my own experience over a stupid man.

I tried not to let it ruin my trip, but it did impact it inevitably. I found myself constantly checking my phone. I didn’t enjoy the time with my friends or seeing amazing places as much as I should have. I started to resent myself for ruining my experience over a stupid man. If I could do it again, I would have done that part differently.

The biggest lesson I’ve learned is not letting other people’s actions control my emotions. I also learned not to put so much weight on relying on others for happiness, especially when I have so much more around me to be happy about. —Ariel*, 23, Dublin, Ireland

He Fell Asleep After Inviting Me Over & I Walked Home Alone In The Rain

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He was my best friend from childhood. We started becoming more than friends in high school, but nothing ever came of it. We both would’ve described it as “right person, wrong time.” We finally started hooking up last summer because we mutually agreed it wouldn’t compromise our friendship. We were both about to move away.

It fizzled out after a few weeks, but the night before I left town, he asked me to “hang.” Feeling sentimental, I let him pick me up. When we got to his house, we sat around talking and listening to music, and then he put on a movie. I kept hinting that I had work in the morning and wanted to go home, but he told me to stay. Finally, I said I was getting in the car, and he asked me if he could fall asleep on me. I ended up walking home alone in the rain.

He’ll still hit me up, but I don’t think we’ll ever be more than friends again.

We still talk, and he’ll still hit me up, but I don’t think we’ll ever be more than friends again. I was content being single that summer, but I was also kind of holding on to hope that we would start dating. The walk home made me reflect on my self-worth, and I don’t think I’ll ever allow some guy to let me walk home alone while he sleeps again. — Jane*, 20s

I Found Out He Ended Things Because He Went On A Dating Show

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Last year I was ready to have a single girl summer, but I met this guy at a bar. He told my friend’s boyfriend that he found me attractive and reached out for my number. We started texting, went on several great dates, and began hooking up. Looking back, I definitely overlooked some major red flags about his personality that came out later.

Toward the end of the summer, there was a month when neither of our schedules lined up, so we couldn’t see each other for a while. He reassured me it would be fine. I naively believed him.

When he got back into town, I invited him to a dinner at my friend's, but he said we could meet afterward because he had plans. He kept pushing back meeting me later and later, and when we finally met up at a bar, he was acting very cold.

I tried to ignore it, but at the end of the night, he told me he was going home and that I should go back to my place. I’m not going somewhere I’m not wanted, so I started to leave. That’s when he changed his mind and begged me to come over.

I got the text that every girl in a situationship gets: ‘Hey I need to talk to you about something.’

We had a normal night until the morning when he was a little more standoffish than normal, and I saw him texting a random number. I had a gut feeling something was up. On Thursday night, I got the text that every girl in a situationship gets: “Hey I need to talk to you about something.” He told me he didn’t feel as excited about me as he used to, and we’d be better as friends.

I was shocked and frustrated. I cried, watched When Harry Met Sally, and listened to a lot of Taylor Swift’s folklore. A few days later, I was scrolling TikTok when a clip from a comedy show called UpDating popped up on my FYP. To my surprise, the boy I was seeing was sitting there on the show, on a date, and later making out with another girl. I was shocked. I went to YouTube to watch the full thing, and his episode was the cringiest performance I’ve ever seen.

I did some investigating and found out the show was filmed on the last night we hung out — when he was non-responsive and texting that random number. Seeing him embarrass himself and get roasted by the hosts cured me of all sadness and heartache.

This summer is the “summer of outside” — to quote Tinx. I'm deleting my apps, going on trips with friends, and doing things that make me happy. I'm prioritizing myself and my own goals. — Emily*, 27, New York City

These interviews have been condensed and edited for clarity.

*Names have been changed.