Relationships

People Reveal When They Want Relationships, So If You're Sick Of Being Single, Listen Up

by Sydnee Lyons

Research — and every romantic comedy ever released — suggests that dating is as seasonal as the fresh bloom of May flowers or the warmth of the holiday season. As the calendar turns from summer flings to turkey dumps to cuffing seasons, I can’t help but wonder: when do people want relationships?

We know when they don't. According to Facebook relationship data compiled by data journalist David McCandless and design technologist Lee Byron, breakups tend to occur more often at certain times of the year. For example, the study reveals that a large number of people end their relationships around Thanksgiving, giving the holiday the unfortunate stigma of the turkey dump. Breakups also increase in early- to mid-March, suggesting a probable correlation between college spring break and the overall desire to be single (and ready to mingle) at this time. For post-grads, breakups might be linked to spring cleaning.

There’s no exact science involved, but there are a number of factors to consider when it comes to your own relationship timeline. I know this to be true because in the past, I have scheduled my own breakups. For example, when I was in high school, I strategically pursued a relationship a few weeks before my senior prom and, yes, ended it not long after. Am I proud of this? No. Was it effective? Yes.

To be fair, I reconnected with this person after our first breakup and, by the time we broke up for the second and last time, it was evident the relationship had run its course.

That said, it’s not difficult to believe that if people schedule their breakups, there might in fact be some intentionality involved when they decide to pursue something more serious. I asked six people whether or not they adhered to any sort of timeline when deciding to start a relationship and here's what they had to say.

This woman doesn't have a set schedule, but says cuffing season has a reputation for a reason.

Personally, I don’t look for or end my relationships based on the time of the year but, on another note, the holidays are a rough time to be single because you want to be able to experience that holiday joy with the person you love.

- Larissa, 21

This man agrees. Maybe I should set them up?

I think winter is the season of the relationship, but if I’m dating someone, I’d prefer it be more than just occasional or seasonal.

- Nicholas, 26

Here's another cuffing-season truther. They're everywhere.

Well holidays it’s obviously better bc that’s a depressing time for most. but you gotta find somebody that you want when you’re cold, sweating, stuck in the rain, sunburned, and when snow gets in your boots.

- avohcadough

This woman says, "Summer lovin' had me a blast, summer lovin' happened so fast."

I wouldn’t say my attitude toward relationships coincides with any particular part of the year. I always just end up being the most single during the summer.

- Liz, 25

This guy just goes with the flow. I strive to be more like him.

Relationships happen when they happen.

- Chad, 29

This man is, as the kids say, goals.

I’m the type of person who thrives in a relationship, so the only factor for me is the amount of time in between. The longer I’ve been single, the greater the desire to be in a relationship. The time of year doesn’t matter to me personally.

- Joseph, 26

Cuffing season may be a good reason to get into a relationship, but it's not the only reason. There are a lot of other factors to consider, like whether or not you're even ready for a serious relationship. Don't rush into something just because you're dying for a New Year's kiss and don't carelessly end things with someone special just because you want to rage with your friends in Cancún over spring break. A serious relationship should never be one of convenience.

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