I was sitting in a Mexican restaurant, elbows deep in a shrimp burrito, when a face I would recognize anywhere suddenly walked through the door. There, on what seemed to be a particularly steamy first date, was someone I had once gone out with. But they were laughing and holding hands with someone else. Even if your mouth isn't full of chimichanga, there's never a good time to randomly run into an old flame. And while you can't plan for everything in this life, knowing what you would say to the ex who broke your heart can make you feel marginally more prepared for an impromptu run-in.
No matter how long you dated someone, getting dumped by someone you loved sucks. It blows, it bites, and it feels like every other verb teenagers use to express negativity. When you've fallen for someone, learning that you aren't on the same page about your feelings is totally disorienting. And while everyone heals differently, knowing what you would say to an ex can help you move on.
Elite Daily asked 17 women what they would say to the ex that broke their heart, and all their answers will give you comfort, if not closure.
1. I Wish I Could Stop Loving You
I wish I could stop loving you. I wish I could stop thinking about you. Months later I wake up and want it to be next to you. I miss you and the person you are. I hate that I care so much about you, when you clearly didn't care enough about me.
2. I Wish You Hadn't Led Me On For So Long
Why would you say yes to being my partner if you knew from the beginning that you couldn't handle being in a relationship? It hurts to emotionally invest yourself, and then to hear that it wasn't working from the beginning. I'm so disappointed that you didn't feel comfortable enough to tell me. I wish you hadn't lead me on for so long just to figure out something about yourself.
3. I Deserve Better Than You
Your actions the last months of our relationship absolutely disgust me and I don't like the person you've changed in to. While it still hurts incredibly bad that it's over, thank you for breaking up with me and doing what I didn't have the guts to do. I deserve far better than you.
4. You Owe My Dog An Apology
You owe my dog an apology. She slept in a laundry room for 10 months when she's the one I should've been sharing the bed with.
5. I Will Always Love You
I will always love you. We aren't together now and I don't want to get back together but there was something in you that made me want to be with you so long ago and so I wont allow myself to talk badly about you.
6. You're An Idiot
I would just call him an idiot.
7. I Should Have Listened To You
I should of listened to him when he said he was only smitten with me. He told me to my face that he didn't see us going anywhere serious and I didn't want to hear it.
8. Live A Good Life
I think her and I aired everything out we needed to last time we spoke. I suppose all I would say is something along the lines of 'Live a good life, and good luck with everything.'
9. Your Art Is Bad
Your art is bad! And I don’t want to be with someone with poor personal hygiene!
— Stella, 23
10. I Wasted Two Years With You
You were the most garbage human I have ever known and I cannot believe I wasted two years of my life being with you.
11. I Thought You Were Better Than That
I thought I could love you enough for you to be good to me and better to yourself.
— Juniper, 32
12. I Know I Was The Other Girl
I'd tell him that I know I was the other girl. I found out not too long after we broke up. Not that I didn’t suspect it prior, but I wouldn’t let myself believe it. Honestly, I'd thank him for ending it with me. It made me realize I was stronger than I thought I was. Hopefully one day his other girlfriend will realize the same about herself.
13. You Really Missed Out
I'd say, 'You know, back when I was struggling to achieve my dream you didn't support me. Remember when you told me that your family has asked you why I wasn't in school and you implied that you agreed with them?' Then I'd tell him he really missed out.
14. I Should Have Let You Pay For More Dinners
You're an egocentric jack*ss. And I should have let you pay for more dinners.
— Christene, 27
15. I'm Sorry For Who I Became
I'm sorry for who I became. It wasn't the best version of me. I became angry and jealous. Thank you for realizing these aspects in me and inspiring me to become myself again. I am working on that now, and I see the change I want to be.
16. I Wish We Had Communicated Better
I wish we communicated better. I thought we were on the same page. Obviously not.
— Lucy, 26
17. I Was Worth The Effort
Why couldn’t you have stuck by my side the way I stuck by yours? I was worth the effort.
— Aubrey, 29
Whether you're still feeling hurt, or you're ready to move on, you know what you need to feel loved and supported after a breakup. Knowing what to say to an ex is never easy, especially if they broke your heart. As my mom always says, "There are plenty of fish in the sea." Your ex may be in your past, but someone excellent is sure to be in your future.