Kourtney K Broke Down In Tears Before Her 40th Birthday For A Sad Reason

by Jamie LeeLo

It wouldn't be a Keeping Up With The Kardashians clip if it didn't have drama. While Season 16 of KUWTK just wrapped up with the cheating rumor heard around the world, Season 17 is primed and apparently almost ready to go. A new teaser for the impending seventeenth installment of the popular reality show features a teary-eyed Kourtney Kardashian grappling with her anxiety. The video of Kourtney Kardashian breaking down came courtesy of her impending 40th birthday. Fans know Kourt hit the big four-oh on April 18, but in this teaser it's still just around the bend and giving our main girl anxiety.

Listen, my therapist once told me that birthdays that end with the numbers zero and five are "the most loaded," meaning they usually come with some emotional baggage. It's natural for humans to use big birthdays as milestone markers of where they're at in their life. We all have hypothesized of what 25, 30, 40, and so on would look like, right? You think, "I'll have this kind of job by that age, and have x amount of kids by the time I'm [blank years] old." Based on Kourtney's weepy conversation with her little sister Khloé, it appears she was doing exactly that.

Khloé asked the seemingly innocent question, "Are you happy?" adding, "I feel like you are like redirecting your anxiety and stress or whatever it is on your party or maybe turning a little older, I don't know."

Kourtney thoughtfully responded, "I feel like turning 40... It almost makes you analyze like, where you're at in your life."

Like with most people, Kourtney explained how she always wishes she had more time. She also wondered if she was using silly things in life as a means of distraction so she doesn't have to address bigger thoughts or areas. (Hm, sounds... dare I say relatable?)

As she dabbed her eyes with a tissue, she revealed to Khloé, "It gives me anxiety and I don't know why. 'Cause then I'm like, 'I have so much and I should just be so happy.'" She went on to explain while she believes she is happy, she sometimes will just "do stupid sh*t to distract from really thinking about stuff that is maybe more important." She then mused, "I don't know ... then half of me is like, 'Live your life. Have fun.'"

I've never felt closer to a Kardashian in my life. Kourtney, I get you, girl.

Khloé tried to validate Kourtney's impulses by explaining that doing what she enjoys and finds fulfilling is the most important thing in life. "If you're happy, that's all that should matter for any of us," she says. "But I really don't think your soul is happy…I think you feel incomplete somewhere. But you're scared." While I half expected Kourtney to get defensive, she didn't. Instead, she just sat there and thoughtfully looked off into the distance.

Take a look:

Season 17 is scheduled to air sometime this fall and who knows what other footage it's going to include! As usual, fans will just have to keep up, strap in, and stand by. Hang in there, Kourtney! (I happen to know your 40th birthday turns out amazing.)