Lifestyle

5 Annoying Things You're Probably Saying Since Mercury Is In Sagittarius

by Rosey Baker
Noam Galai/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

If you're not familiar with Mercury (and you should be, because I have been over this a million times, please refer to my author page), it's the planet of communication, technology, the written and spoken word. This planet recently moved into the sign of Sagittarius, the dogmatic philosopher, whose curiosity is only outdone by its sense of superiority. Mercury in Sagittarius 2017 will be coloring all of our communication with a kind of know-it-all quality to it, and that could literally repel others from wanting to hang out with you. I mean, especially considering that they're being affected by the same transit. Think about it: A whole planet of people thinking they know better than everyone else, thinking THEY have the answers to the world's problems, and refusing to listen to the opinions of others? OMG, it's almost as nightmarish as... well, the exact world we're living in right now.

So here are a few phrases to consider throwing out of your vocabulary into a trash bin outside, covering in gasoline and setting on fire forever. I mean just to consider it. I'm not one to tell you what to do, but I can tell you what you're doing — especially if what you're doing makes you a pain in everyone's ass.

Starting all your sentences with the following phrases is a symptom of Mercury in Sagittarius GONE WILD.

"Well, actually..."

If you think for one second this is an acceptable way to begin correspondence with someone, you are terribly mistaken my friend. Mercury in Sagittarius loves a debate, but guess what?

Your friends dislike you when you are constantly looking for one. Please turn off your desperate need to argue with someone and go read a book. At least Mercury in Sagittarius ignites your curiosity and might inspire you to expand your knowledge about something.

"Um, I've been reading about this, and..."

Just because you've been reading doesn't mean you have to brag about it. OK, so you read a book. One book. I'm glad you took my advice, but you're doing the wrong things with it. People used to read books all the time without needing to take credit for it; it's a basic skill. First graders can do it. Reading a book does not make you an expert on the subject you read about. Keep it to yourself, smarty pants.

"Nobody really knows about this, but..."

Let me stop you right there. Somebody does know about it. Whatever you're about to say, someone has already said it. Mercury in Sagittarius tends to make people believe that they're like genius professors with the key to knowledge that nobody else has.

But the truth is, unless you are channeling some information from an alien in a higher-plane of the fifth dimension, I can guarantee you aren't the first to share whatever it is you're about to share.

"Well, I did go to Harvard, so...."

Sagittarius is a sign that is obsessed with education, and many Sagittarians continue to pursue their education long into adulthood. But let me say this, and I will only say it once: Harvard needs to teach a f*cking class about not mentioning you are from Harvard.

"When I was backpacking through Europe this summer..."

Sagittarius is a sign that loves to travel overseas, and Mercury is a planet that likes to talk. But I swear to God Susan, if you don't shut the f*ck up about your trip to Europe, we are all going to buy you a one-way forever ticket back there. It's great that your horizons have expanded, and that you learned so much about Picasso, but guess what? You're an American, and there's nothing more American than going to Europe and thinking you're somehow different than the rest of us loud-mouthed bastards, OK?!?!