Confession time: My partner and I don't always sleep in the same room. I'm a light sleeper who struggles with insomnia, so there are times when I can't get comfortable, or my partner making any noise in their sleep will wake me up. So, at least a few nights a week, I sneak off because it's the only way I can possibly hope to get some rest. Makes sense, right? And yet, I still felt ashamed of it, as if it was some dark secret. I often wonder: Is it normal to sleep in separate beds sometimes? Or is not physically sleeping together going to ruin the relationship?
While I knew why I was making the choice to sleep on my own and felt like it was justified, I still couldn't help feeling self conscious about what people's perceptions might be of our relationship if they learned how often we sleep separately. I tell myself that it's no one's business but ours, but still, that shame lingers. Which is why I was really interested in speaking to relationship experts about whether or not it's OK to sleep apart, and when or if I should be worried that in doing so, it would put my relationship in danger.