When I stepped into the tiny, cozy room at Mosaic Wellness for my clairvoyant session, I wasn’t expecting the sort of profound revelations I ended up receiving. In fact, I’m not quite sure what I expected. I entered the room with a sort of lighthearted, open-minded curiosity, and left it an hour later with my head spinning and my heart raw as a blooming wound. I feel so empowered now. I feel validated. I feel a little bit more free. I never knew meeting with a psychic would give me some much needed clarity.
Not everyone is lucky enough to be born into a loving family. Not everyone is cut out for parenthood. To give you a bit of insight: My mother and father were huge let-downs at best, pretty monstrous at worst. My mother had so many demons, and she wasn’t strong enough to deal with any of them. I won’t bore you with the tragedy of it all, but she took a lot of her issues out on me as a child. She checked out of my life when I was still a kid, and I went to live with my father, with whom I’d always had a pretty terrible relationship as well. He’s not in my life at all now.
I didn't really expect Lighthart to pick up on any of this, but what she said about my relationship with my family during our session surprised and comforted me in really profound ways. Here's what it was like having a one-on-one visit with a psychic, and how it helped me heal.
When I stepped into Mosaic Wellness, where Deborah Lighthart gives readings, she led me to a tiny room with just enough room for a little, black card table and two plush chairs. She motioned for me to have a seat as she sat down. Lighthart then took a moment to explain to me what I could expect from the session.
"I am clairvoyant," she started, "I never really know exactly what's going to come up with every single person I read for, so I just kind of wing it." She laughed, and I said that sounded great to me. Lighthart asked if I had any specific questions I wanted answered, and I didn't. She then closed her eyes, sat up straight in her chair, her arms laid out along the chair arms with her palms up, and began to hum a long, low note.
Her brow was furrowed in concentration as she breathed deeply and called upon spirits to guide our session. I didn't really know what to do with myself, so I followed her lead and closed my eyes, too, and tried to clear my mind.
The Actual Reading
After a moment, her eyes still closed, Lighthart started to reveal what she could spiritually sense about my childhood. She knew my father was a religious zealot who had checked out of my life, and that my mother was a neurotic woman, too plagued with her own personal demons to be the sort of mother I deserved. She said I’d been born into this same family dynamic many times over, and that, by finally breaking free of them, I fulfilled one of my missions in this life. Hooray! She told me that I’m free now to thrive without them, and to connect with my own power in a way that wouldn’t have been possible with my parents’ toxicity still bogging down my life.
I felt a wave of peace wash over me as I sat dumbfounded in a plush little chair. The universe, through Lighthart, had just given me the closure I'd been seeking for most of my life. Lighthart also told me that my main mission in this life is to reconnect with my own inner power, and that I'm well on my way to doing that. How encouraging!
The Tarot Reading
Lighthart is also a professional tarot reader, and to close the session, she pulled out a deck of tarot cards. She spread them out all over the table, and had me spread them around, too, before she gathered them together in a neat stack and asked me to cut the deck. I did, and she laid out the cards in a very large, intricate spread. "You're going to be doing a lot of traveling in the coming winter!" she announced suddenly.
She said I'd be getting a positive, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that would lead me into a flurry of activity this winter, around January. She described my current life as being in a "calm before the storm" sort of period that I'm supposed to be enjoying and using to store up energy for the coming journey. I don't know what this opportunity could possibly be, but I'm taking Lighthart's advice and focusing on self-care in preparation.
What I Learned
I feel so validated after my session with Lighthart. For years, I’ve struggled emotionally with not having parents in my life. I know I’m so much better off psychologically and emotionally without them around, but there had always been a little seed of doubt somewhere in the back of my mind that wondered if I’m supposed to try to have relationships with my family again. Meeting with Lighthart gave me the sort of cosmic affirmation I’ve been needing to quiet that little bit of nagging doubt. I’m doing just fine on my own. I feel a profound sense of peace and closure now when I think about my family. I’ve forgiven my parents as part of my healing process, but that doesn’t mean I need to open myself back up to their toxicity. I have people in my life who love and support me, and those are the relationships I need to worry about cultivating and nurturing. Lighthart helped me see that pruning the toxic weeds out of my garden of friends and family was an essential and brave act of self-care. Now, without them, I’m in bloom.
Lighthart told me that one of my main missions in this life is to reconnect with my own power, and I think the sense of closure I feel now when I think of my family is essential to that. My parents failed me, but that’s OK. I see now that I can be both mother and father to myself. I can give myself the love they never showed me. I can nurture myself in all the ways they never did, and I can thrive in my own way, in spite of them.