B&M Is Hiring A Chicken Nuggets Connoisseur & I Need This Job
Listen, if there's one thing that gets me riled up, it's a debate about who has the best chicken nuggets. In my opinion, Chick-fil-A is top tier, with Wendy's coming in at a relatively close second. In my opinion, very few chicken nuggets can come close to the superiority that these two hold, but damn if they don't try, and damn if I'm not going to scour the ends of the Earth until I find one worthy of the number three spot. If you're a chicken nugget freak like me, you probably have your own criteria for what can be considered the best of the best chicken nugget. Now, there's a job out there for those of us who are passionate about quality nugs. B&M is hiring a Chicken Nuggets Connoisseur, so if you think you've got what it takes, listen up.
According to Cosmopolitan, B&M is currently hiring, but not for sales associates or truck drivers. The England-based grocery store is hiring a Chicken Nuggets Connoisseur, as in someone who literally gets paid to eat chicken nuggets. But this job isn't just for any old someone. There is a lot of important, relevant experience required for a title as prestigious as this one. B&M only wants the best of the best, in order to ensure that they're serving their customers only the highest quality foods.
Relevant experience for the position includes getting the 20 share box of nuggets from McDonalds (and not sharing), valuing your plate of food over your own safety, attending events strictly because they will have free food, and being able to conduct a PowerPoint presentation as to why curly fries are superior to regular chips. Yes, even for a job like this, you need some Microsoft Office experience.
If you want to get professional about it, the Chicken Nugget Connoisseur will serve as a temporary taste tester for the grocer, trying out their fresh and frozen food range. Compensation for the job is £25 ($35) worth of vouchers every month to spend on fresh and frozen food in your local B&M store. That's a lot of chicken nuggets.
So, how does one land this dream job? To apply, visit the B&M website and fill out your information in the application portal. Instead of a traditional resume and cover letter outlining what you've learned from trying out every single fast food nugget on the market, a simple paragraph about your chicken nugget experience and why you deserve the position will suffice. Keep in mind that the position is based in England, so if you don't already live there, you'll have to decide if this dream job is worth the move — who am I kidding? Of course it is.
Another European company announced recently a dream job opportunity, as well. TUI, a multinational travel and tourism company based in Germany, was on the hunt for four "Professional Slackers." Like the Chicken Nugget Connoisseur position, this one was temporary, but the job perks and lack of necessary experience definitely made it sound worthwhile.
The job duties include hanging out in a cozy, beachy office, wearing summery attire, and putting your feet in the sand. Napping, light reading, meditating, and ignoring commuters on their way to work are also strongly encouraged while on the job. Professional Slackers, also known as Fakeation Specialists, must always put their own relaxation above any other pressing matter. Unfortunately, the application closed on Jan. 14, but it's never too late to start preparing for the next opening. After you fill out your Chicken Nugget Connoisseur application, get to work — by doing absolutely no work at all.
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