Doing things without your friends by your side can be a little intimidating. You rely on them for support, and can always trust that they're going to offer you the best advice. But sometimes, you need time to figure out stuff for yourself, and there are just some things you'd rather do by yourself than with friends. That's not to say that you don't love them and appreciate everything they contribute to your friendship. It just means that you value your alone time just as much as you enjoy hanging with them — and that's totally OK.
While there are some things in your life you can't picture doing without your besties (you really need each other so you don't ugly-cry alone when you're watching This Is Us), part of growing up is learning to be comfortable with doing some other things by yourself. Growing up teaches you to be OK with taking yourself out to dinner, or sitting in a coffee shop alone with a good book. Though these things may be uncomfortable at first, you'll learn to enjoy having some activities that are just for you.
The next time you need to do any of these things, try to do it by yourself. You might be surprised at how adult it makes you feel.
While it's always nice to get your friends' opinions on what to buy, sometimes it's kind of nice to go shopping by yourself. You can go at your own pace, hit up your favorite stores, and maybe even take a quick froyo break without having to worry about keeping track of the whole crew. I've also found that I spend significantly less money when I go shopping by myself than when I go with friends, because I don't have anyone there to talk me into buying something I'm on the fence about.
Visiting museums can be a really fun thing to do with friends (you need someone there to take a pic if you being #artsy). But there's something really therapeutic about wandering around a museum all by yourself. You can take the time to really learn more about the art.
One of my favorite ways to catch up with friends is to meet at a coffee shop, and ironically, coffee shops are also my favorite place to be alone to get work done. It's nice to have a space where you can do both. Coffee shops offer a really pleasant ambiance for both activities, and if you're craving some alone time, but don't love total quiet, a coffee shop is the perfect setting for you.
I know, trying out a new workout class without a motivation buddy might not sound as fun. But sometimes, it's nice to experience new things on your own, especially classes.
Workouts, painting classes, and cooking classes are all fun with friends, of course, but they can also be really enjoyable on your own. You might discover something you didn't know you loved, and you can make it a ritual for yourself to get some well-deserved alone time every once in a while.
As a freelancer, I often show up at events with no plus one and no one that I know at the event, and I'll admit that I've turned down events in the past because I couldn't get a plus one and didn't want to show up by myself. But as I've grown up and gotten used to doing things on my own, I've embraced the culture of heading to events by myself. It can be a lot of fun to wander around a party and meet new people — and my small talking skills have seriously improved.
You'd think that no one ever really wants to dance at a concert by themselves, but honestly, it's a pretty liberating feeling. You can just let go and enjoy the music without worrying about talking to your friends. And truthfully, no one really cares if you're there by yourself — they're just there to enjoy the music, same as you.
It sounds kind of weird to go out to dinner by yourself, right? Wrong. Taking yourself out on a date can be so much fun. If you're feeling a little bougie, you can treat yo' self to some apps, a glass of wine, and a dessert (in addition to your entree), because why not? Plus, you don't have to worry about splitting the check at the end of the meal.
Some of my favorite memories of living in New York City were when I wandered around a neighborhood by myself and stumbled upon cool cafés and boutiques. I've found that my friends and I often go to the same places over and over again, because we've found our "spots," but it's nice to discover something new on your own, too.
