7 Red Flags You're Growing Apart From Your Friends At Home
Dorothy was right when she said, "There's no place like home." No matter how far away you go, you will always have your hometown to turn to. Some of your best friends since childhood may even still live there, which makes going back even better. You made a pact that even though you were leaving for college or a job, you would remain friends for a lifetime. However, even the best of friends can become distant over time. The miles might not have been a problem before, but now, you may start noticing some red flags you're growing apart from your friends at home.
Drifting away from people is never easy, but it happens to us all at one point or another when we're in our 20s. You left town for a reason, and you're exactly where you're supposed to be in life. You just have to remember that friends come and go — this might even include the ones you expected to be in your wedding someday.
When you start to notice these seven red flags, you and your hometown friends may be drifting apart. There are ways to cope, and you will be fine. You will always be grateful for the time you did have together when you lived in the same place. Those friendships lead the way for even better friendships to come. That's your silver lining.
1. The Last Time You Texted Each Other Has A Dated Time Stamp
If you look at your texts and realize the last time you texted your hometown friends is a date rather than a day, it could be a red flag that you are communicating way less. You used to talk everyday when you lived in the same zip code. Now, you go weeks and even months without speaking to each other.
2. You Don't Know Their Job Or Job Title
If you're talking about your hometown friend and someone asks you what they do, if you can't answer with complete confidence about their job and title, then that's a major red flag. You don't automatically know the 411 on their life, and instead, have to result to checking their Facebook or LinkedIn to get the scoop. Ouch.
3. All Of The People In Their Instagram Photos Are Strangers
You should have a vague idea of who your friend's friends are. If you see an Insta pic and all of the people they're hanging out with are complete strangers to you, it most likely means you haven't been checking in.
4. You Want To Call Them When You're In Need, But Stop Yourself
Friends should be there for you when you're going through a tough time, and also to celebrate the best of times. Your hometown squad got you through so much when you were growing up. They were there when you went through your first breakup, and when you got your first car.
Now when you're dealing with something in your life, you want to pick up the phone and give them a call, but you may be hesitant. It could be because you feel a little weird spilling the details after not speaking in quite sometime. Or, you think they've moved on with new friends.
5. The Algorithm Isn't Putting Them In Your Newsfeed Anymore
Social media is your best bud when you are trying to connect with your long-distance friends. If you're constantly being updated with your friend's Facebook and Instagram activity, you feel like you're hanging out, even if you aren't.
When you and your friends are getting distant, the algorithm will know. You will see less of your friend's statuses and pictures pop up. This might be because you're making less of an effort to go and look for them.
6. You Text Them When You're Already Home, Rather Than When You Book Your Plane Ticket
When you're coming home for a visit, you used to tell your friends the minute you started planning your trip, because you were so excited. You already had your calendar filled with catching up events with your mains.
Now, you send out a vague text of "Hey, we should meet up. I'm in town." Or maybe a generic Facebook status announcing you've arrived is more your jam. It's a sign that you're not making them a priority to see.
7. You Feel Nervous Talking To Them Or Meeting Up
It's always a little awkward meeting up with someone you haven't seen in awhile. Back when you first moved away, when you came back to town, you and your friends would get together and automatically feel comfortable as if no time had passed at all. Now, you feel the butterflies in your stomach of how awkward it will be catching up, and you wonder what you'll talk about.
I'm not going to lie — growing apart and realizing these things really sucks. If you find yourself broken up, it never hurts to reach out to a friend and try to rekindle the flame as soon as you can.