Knowing when someone's into you can be tricky. For some reason, it can be so much easier to tell when someone's interested in one of your friends. That’s likely because you can be an objective observer when watching how people interact with your friends, making it easier to pick up on patterns and the vibe. But when it comes to you, the situation is often too close to completely take in. In that case, knowing the signs someone really likes you can be super helpful in clarifying those gray areas between someone being interested or just flirty, versus someone who's desirous of getting closer to you.
The question is, though, are there reliable signs that someone feels this way you can actually pick up on? According to Connell Barrett, Dating Transformation founder and dating coach with The League, there are. "When someone likes you, it's almost impossible for them not to show signs of interest. They can't help it. Like a radio tower, we're always broadcasting to the other person how we feel," he tells Elite Daily. It's just about being observant and knowing what to keep an eye out for. So, if someone's exhibiting these behaviors, chances are they have a crush on you, even if they haven't had a chance to say so yet.
Getting to know other people takes effort, but when you really like someone it doesn’t feel that way. In fact, you're eager to learn everything about them. “This is why a big sign someone likes you is that they ask you a lot of questions. Showing interest itself is a big sign of romantic interest,” says Barrett.
If you’ve crushed hard on someone before, you already know how tempting their social media is. So, if someone really likes you, chances are there's evidence on your social media. “They'll start commenting or liking your pictures and continue doing so over a number of days. The comments will usually be worded in a way to get a response out of you. Kind of like innocent flirting,” Cherlyn Chong, a dating and breakup recovery coach for professional women, tells Elite Daily.
Someone who's into you is going to find any reason to be in contact, explains Chong. If it seems like they're going out of their way to find excuses to send you messages, chances are they're catching feelings. “They'll ask about your day and start sending you things they think you'd like. They might also invite you out somewhere with a group of friends, sort of like a date, but something they can also pass off as a friendly gesture,” explains Chong.
When you’re in person, someone who's really feeling you will make a point of striking up conversation, says Chong. “For example, if you’re at a gathering, they'll talk to other people but will keep circling back to you. They'll ask you about what you're interested in, about your job, etc.,” she explains.
Does it seem like they laugh at all your jokes and hang on your every word? If so, Barrett says this is a clear sign they're into you. "When someone has a crush on you, there's what's called a 'halo effect,' meaning that you can do no wrong in their eyes,” he explains. “This leads to behavior like them laughing a little too loud or too long at your jokes, even if the comment wasn't that funny. To them, it was funny. If they become a human laugh track, they have a crush on you."
While someone who really likes you might tip their hand in the way they communicate with you, some of the clearest signs, says Barrett, are simply in the small ways they behave around you. "Notice non-verbal signs such as deep eye contact, fidgeting, playing with their hair, blushing, or trying to stand extra straight and tall,” he explains.
If someone in your life's exhibiting all these signs, then what happens next is really up to you — depending on how you feel about them in return. "If someone's showing you these signs, you have two options. If you like them, flirt back. Mirror them, giving back to them what they're giving to you. And if they don't ask you out, by all means, take the lead and take a chance. They may be too shy,” suggests Barrett. However, if you aren’t feeling it, he suggests being friendly but not flirtatious in return. "That would be leading them on. Instead, smile and be warm to them, but don't return the deep eye contact or signs of interest with your own," he concludes. Either way, the ball — and the knowledge — is in your court now.
Experts cited:
Connell Barrett, Dating Transformation founder and dating coach with The League
Cherlyn Chong, a dating and breakup recovery coach for professional women
