5 Things You'll Notice If You Have A Jealous Partner, Because It Can Be So Toxic

by Korey Lane

Relationships can be complicated, and even if you and your partner are totally in love, that doesn't mean things will always be just peachy between you. There will be ups and downs, and even the most dedicated couples have their fair share of problems. Jealousy, for example, can be a common issue for some, and even the most secure couple can succumb to a bad bout of the green monster. But if you think your significant other is starting to get envious or suspicious for no reason at all, then these things you'll notice if you have a jealous partner might help you identify that your partner might be jealous by nature.

Of course, jealousy is a complex issue, and it's important to try to put yourself in your partner's shoes and understand why your partner might be feeling the way they are. "One thing to consider with someone who is jealous is whether or not they are anxiously attached," dating and relationships expert and licensed marriage and family therapist Anita A. Chlipala, tells Elite Daily. "Anxiously attached people more commonly are jealous and insecure about their relationship. They are more suspicious that their partner is unfaithful, even if there are no signs of infidelity."

If your partner is jealous or anxiously attached, there are definitely things that you'll notice about them that can be helpful to keep in mind. No one deserves to feel watched or judged in a relationship, so take notes.

They Always Want To Look At Your Phone

If your partner wants to constantly see your phone and who you're talking to, chances are, they're the jealous type. "A lack of trust when it comes to who you are friends with and with whom you are communicating with via social media and email," is a sign of jealousy, Eric Resnick, online dating coach and dating profile writer, tells Elite Daily.

Additionally, Resnick adds it might feel like an invasion of privacy to you, especially if your partner is always "going through your phone, bag, computer, anything that the other person thinks might have evidence to prove their suspicions correct." (Read: This is not cool, y'all!)

They're Overly Concerned With Your Social Media Profiles

Another thing you might notice if you have a jealous partner is that they like to know and see what you post on social media. "Questioning your posts on social media to your friends or family can indicate that they want control over the information that you are putting out there," matchmaking and dating expert Stef Safran tells Elite Daily.

They Say They Don't Like Your Friends

Jealousy can sometimes rear its ugly head if your partner tells you they don't like some of your friends. For instance, them giving you "ultimatums that you are not allowed to hang out with or communicate with certain people," as Resnick says, is an indicator that your significant other might have jealousy issues.

They Always Want Alone Time With You, All The Time

Additionally, if your bae keeps you on a tight leash, or somehow takes up all of your time, they may be acting out of jealousy. "Behavior that attempts to keep you isolated with your partner instead of allowing you to have the freedom of spending some time with friends outside of the relationship," is something Resnick says is indicative of a jealous partner. Again, this behavior can be toxic, so if you recognize it in your partner, take note.

They're Accusatory

Finally, a jealous partner is one who tends to accuse you of things that aren't necessarily true. "If your partner refuses to have conversations about their concerns, but instead acts accusatory, this can also indicate that they are jealous," Safran says.

But remember: If you find your partner is jealous, there may be a way to point out their behavior so that it doesn't have to lead to a breakup. "There can be a reason why your partner may be jealous over an issue that has nothing to do with them being a controlling, jealous person," Safran explains. "Sometimes cheating in a past relationships may cause someone to be cautious, anxious or jealous, which has nothing to do with the current person, but more to do with a past trust issue."

Whatever the reason, jealousy can definitely be unhealthy. "If jealously is a constant feeling, that is usually an indicator of a greater problem in the relationship (either with you or with your partner)," Resnick says. "Jealousy can become a means to guilt and control your partner and that type of behavior can often become a self-fulfilling prophecy that drives you apart." So, if you notice these things about your partner, the experts recommend talking it out. You might not know the full story, and whether or not the relationship ends, it's important to try to understand each other.