Fighting with your partner can be really painful, but sometimes what's even worse than the fight itself is the aftermath. That time when you've gone your separate ways to cool down and everything that was said starts to sink in. While taking that space is really important, once you're feeling better the question is who is going to break the silence, and how? Texting is a great way to kind of dip your toe in and test the temperature between you, and it doesn't hurt to have a few romantic texts to send your partner after a fight to both express how you are feeling, but also to remind them why they love you, too.
Just as important as what you say in the text is the timing of when you send it. "It is completely normal for you or your partner to need space after a fight," Kali Rogers, founder of Blush Online Life Coaching, previously told Elite Daily. This is because, as she explains, it gives you the time to get some perspective on what you are really feeling, and to allows you to drop your defenses. It also gives you a chance to "practice how you’d like to articulate an apology," Rogers said.
Once you’ve had enough of a breather to center yourself and know what you want to say, Rogers recommended reaching out via text. "Texting each other can bring back a state of normalcy to the relationship. It can act as a repair to whatever fight occurred and help you two get back into your daily rhythm." She also cautioned to be careful not to restart the fight again over text message. "It’s best to use text for positive messages only — negative messages can be read in the wrong tone or escalate a fight even more," she said.
As for how to know when you're really ready to reach out, Rogers said to wait until you can think about the fight without "emotional flooding," which she described as such: "Your heart starts to race, tone or volume of voice changes, your thoughts start to accelerate, and your defensive tactics skyrocket." Her advice: Wait until you are totally at peace with yourself and the fight.
Now that you know when to reach out, the question remains: What do you say? If the fight has you feeling textually tongue tied, here are some suggestions of messages to send to get you started.