I am afraid of romance. Something about it makes me feel uncomfortable. However, you can't really have a relationship relationship without it. So I often find myself asking, what are some romantic questions to ask your partner that I can use to help deepen the connection? I need some major help in that department.
If it was left up to me, I'd let my partner do all the work in the courtship, flirtation, and romance departments. However, I know that it, of course, takes two to tango (or more, if you're polyamorous), and I need to put in some effort as well if I want my relationship to survive and thrive. And that means asking some cheesy questions every now and then so that my partner knows I'm interested and invested in moving our relationship forward. You know, things that help me continue to find out who my partner truly is, their likes and dislikes when it comes to dating, and what their hopes are for the future.
So here are five romantic questions to ask your partner so you can make your love even deeper. Because you have to get mushy and cheesy every once in a while if you want to find true happiness, I guess.
1. What Do You Like About Us?
Ask your partner what they like best about your relationship. An alternative way to pose this question is by asking, "What do I do that makes you feel special?" You want the chemistry with your significant other to stand out from the dynamic you have in all the other relationships in your life. So find out what makes your relationship unique and magical to your partner. Acknowledging what you like about the person you are with is important so that your SO feels loved and appreciated.
2. What's Your Favorite Memory Of Ours?
Nostalgia is a great way to bond. It allows you to reflect on all the good times you and your partner had together and to figure out what brings each of you joy in your relationship. As you go through your favorite memories, you can even make a scrapbook — something tangible that you both can have forever.
3. What Does The Perfect Relationship Look Like To You?
Ask your partner what their ideal relationship looks like, because their view might look different than yours does. Once you have a concept of what makes your partner happy, and they know what you desire as well, you can try to emulate that for one another. Finding out what your partner likes and catering to it shows a level of thoughtfulness that is sure to deepen the connection you have to one another.
4. What Is Your Sexual Fantasy?
While emotional intimacy is what keeps a relationship together, a sexual connection is what distinguishes it from a friendship. Additionally, a healthy sexual relationship can actually help establish better trust and communication between partners.
So ask your partner what their sexual fantasy is, and if you can hop on board with it, try it out in the bedroom. It might actually strengthen the bond you two have with one another.
5. What Is Your Love Language?
Don't roll your eyes when I mention the words "love language." This sh*t actually works. In case you don't know, this is a philosophy established in the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, which concludes that each person has a different style of giving and receiving love: through gift giving, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch.
Once you figure out how your partner receives love best, you can tailor how you show them love to their individual needs. For example, gifts don't mean very much to me in relationships, but I really respond to physical touch. I'd much rather have a hug than a piece of jewelry. So by informing your partner of how you feel most cared about, you're able to strengthen and deepen the love you have for one another.
When it comes to relationships, emotional depth is an integral part of fostering a long-term, intimate relationship. While lust can bring you together, love and compatibility will sustain you. Don't be afraid to talk about your feelings with your partner. After all, they're exactly whom you should talk to about them.
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