4 Tips For Coping With Relationship Drama, Because Everybody Goes Through It
Relationship drama is really only fun when it's on TV (and then it's insanely fun — is everybody else watching The Bold Type? Or truly any show?). It can be tough when it's your own relationship, though, or the relationships of your friends. It's completely normal to have ups and downs when you're dating someone, and it doesn't mean your relationship isn't going to work out. Still, you shouldn't have to deal with too much drama, so I came up with some tips for coping with relationship drama. You deserve a relationship as drama-free as possible, so I'm happy to help source some strategies.
Not all drama has to stress you out — a lot of relationship drama can be resolved via communication. Of course, you may encounter drama that makes you want to end a relationship, and that's totally fine, too — it's up to you. No one else can tell you when you should or should not end a relationship — not even me, and there's really very little I won't give advice on. If you can work through the drama and get to a place that makes you happy in the relationship, then you've survived relationship drama, and you, too, deserve a show on Freeform.
Read on to find four tips for how to cope with relationship drama, because it does happen to all of us.
1. Communicate With Your Partner
If you feel like your partner is causing relationship drama, the best strategy is to bring it up with them. "Once you become aware that there is now a developing pattern of unwanted drama, you need to quietly and calmly sit down with them — in person and not over the phone or via text — and let them know what your experience is when the drama starts," Dr. Gary Brown, a prominent couples therapist in Los Angeles, tells Elite Daily. Bringing it up as the drama starts allows you to better communicate your needs, and your partner is less likely to think your complaints are coming out of nowhere. Also, you won't feel like you need to rehash the same issues down the line if you're open about your feelings when they arise.
2. Avoid Judgment
Try not to point fingers, especially if the drama could be caused by either of you or outside forces. "Let them know what you like about them to begin the conversation, and then talk in a non-judgmental way about what they do or say and how it is triggering you," Dr. Brown recommends. You might not know how they feel about the drama — even if it's clear to you what the cause is, your partner might see things differently. Being nonjudgmental will allow them to feel comfortable about opening up to you.
3. Evaluate How Much Drama You Can Tolerate
Drama in a relationship is normal, and only you know if the amount of drama your relationship has is too much. "If you find yourself avoiding your partner, avoiding any topic that could be a potential flashpoint, if what should be minor disagreements are becoming major battles on a way too frequent basis, then your relationship may have become so drama-riddled that things are now toxic," Dr. Brown says. "It may also be that the steady drama may, in fact, be an indicator that the two of you are not compatible." Some people don't mind drama, while others can't tolerate much of it, so you need to decide for yourself if the drama is making the relationship feel unhealthy for you.
4. Talk To Your Friends
Sometimes, your friends might be worried about the amount of drama in your relationship. "If a number of friends, family, and perhaps fellow students or work colleagues are commenting on the amount of drama, simply ask them for their feedback," Dr. Brown says. "In particular, ask them to be completely honest about what they see and what their concerns are." Your friends are there to support you, and you're allowed to ask them for help. You don't have to end a relationship because your friends think it's too dramatic, but you do want to count on their support when you need it.
Relationship drama can be stressful, and you're not alone if you're struggling with it. If you keep an open mind and continue to talk to your partner, you can work through even the most challenging of drama. And remember, it's about how you feel about the drama, not anyone else, so you get to decide what's right for you. And once you've moved back relationship drama, why not get your drama fix from Game of Thrones? Who says drama can't be fun?