Like many college students, when I moved into my dorm freshman year, I was almost immediately warned about hooking up with someone on my floor. My building was co-ed, and four guys lived directly next door to my suite of six girls. We had barely moved in and were all unpacking our belongings (with the help of our parents and siblings, I might add), when the guys came in to "say hello."
There's a reason why you hear so many dormcest hookup stories, and there's also a reason why most of these stories include a "don't make the same mistake that I did" clause. As you might have guessed, I hooked up with one of the boys next door, and even went on to date him. But when I ended things, it sure wasn't easy living in such close proximity to my ex.
Whether you choose to heed my advice or not, I'm not the only one with a dormcest horror story. These four women also hooked up with someone in their dorm in college, and though they lived to tell the tale, not all of the relationships survived past freshman year. Here are four scandalous stories of dorm relations that might just make you think twice about pursuing that cutie down the hall.
1. This woman was ghosted by a guy who lived four feet away from her.
I met this guy at summer orientation in June. We flirted all weekend, made out, and we wound up staying in touch all summer long even though we lived in different states. I was completely obsessed with him. Right before our freshman year started at the end of August, we got our dorm assignments. Out of 40,000 students across a dozen different dorms, we found out that we were randomly assigned to live directly across the hall from each other. His dorm room was literally four feet from mine. At first, I was thrilled, because I thought it would be so cute to date this 'amazing guy' who lived across the hall from me. We hooked up a few times and then he ghosted me... again, while living a whole four feet away. I don't regret it, exactly, but it made the rest of the year pretty uncomfortable.
— Hannah, 25
2. This person hooked up with a girl who lived one floor above them.
She was in my Spanish class freshman year and lived on the floor above me. Said she was straight but I knew better (she later confessed she was bi, so points to my gaydar). I honestly don't know how we ended up hooking up, just that we were in her room. TBH, she was a really bad kisser so I had to give her a few pointers. I spent the night and came back downstairs the next morning wearing her shirt, and my roommates thought it was the funniest thing ever. Cue much blushing from me. We didn't hook up again but we're still friends on Facebook and chat occasionally. I'd do it again if the opportunity arose — she's really hot.
— Lauren, 24
3. This woman's best friend lived in her residence hall, and their inevitable hookup changed their relationship for good.
I had a crush on my best friend in my first year of college, and he lived in my residence hall. After months of 'will we or won't we' (our friendship was beyond flirty), we finally kissed. I was over the moon when it started. Except... he didn't know how to do it, exactly. He was awkward and not at all the suave friend I'd known, gracelessly fumbling around in the dark. Basically, the kiss was passionless. All the hype I'd built up to a hook-up, and it was nothing special. We had lots of mutual friends in the building, as our hall was very close knit, and vowed not to tell anyone. Our friendship, which I realized later was built on lust, was over pretty quickly. There were no longer random visits to his room, hours of watching Netflix together. We talk every so often now, trying to repair the damage nearly four years later, but its not the same.
— Mary, 23
4. This woman hooked up with a guy in her dorm, and then found out he had a crush on someone else.
My first two years of college, I lived on campus. My first week in the dorms, the RA set up a meet and greet for everyone in our building. There were three floors — the bottom was the boys floor, and then above that were two girls floors. My roommate and I were on the third floor, and we quickly became friends with one particular boy on the first floor. This boy immediately took interest in me, but I had a boyfriend at the time, so I tried to keep a slight distance. We flirted from time to time, but it was harmless in my mind. Four days after my boyfriend and I broke up, I hooked up with that boy for the first and only time. I was still a virgin at the time, so we didn't do much. We made out, and like kind of felt each other up, but that was pretty much it.
For a while, when we'd see each other after, things were super weird. We were awkward around each other, he had a crush on someone else, and my naïve self thought we were going to at least continue hooking up. We didn't. That was freshman year. Things didn't stop being weird with us until junior year, when we'd get coffee or lunch weekly and catch each other up on our lives. It took two years for things to be back to normal, and now we have a Snap streak of 88 days, so I guess we're good.
— Leah*, 22
When it comes to dormcest, you might end up with a lasting relationship... but more likely, you'll be left with a few hickeys and one very awkward living situation. Since you have a whole campus of people to choose from, if you can — try to avoid choosing a suitor in your dorm.
*Name has been changed.
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