Finding yourself out of a job seriously blows. Whether you were laid off with a dozen other employees, or let go individually for any other reason, there's nothing quite like the sting of realizing your steady job has been pulled out from under you. When it happens to someone you love, it can be hard to know the right words to say. It's a sensitive topic! But knowing how to support your partner when they lose their job is a skill that can prove useful to even the most seasoned, long-lasting couples, because you simply never know.
"The most important thing to remind your partner when they lose their job is that you're there for them," Elle Huerta, CEO & founder of Mend, the breakup recovery app, tells Elite Daily. This is a hard time for your partner, and no matter how they were let go, they're probably not feeling great. Put yourself in their shoes: How would you feel if you lost your current job? What would you want from your significant other?That isn't to say that your partner will definitely need the same kind of support as you do, but it's a good place to start. Here's what else you can do to make sure your partner feels as supported as possible during this tough time.
The first time your partner breaks the news that they've been let go, Huerta explains that it can be "very easy to slip into problem-solving mode immediately (offering to introduce them to people, helping them with their resume, etc)." However, that might not be the best course of action. Sure, you want to help your partner figure things out and find a new job, but that might not be the kind of support they need when the wound is fresh. Try to remember that for some people, a period of time to mourn and heal might be necessary.
According to Huerta, your partner most likely just needs your emotional support, initially. "Losing a job can be heartbreaking, so remind them that you love them and that you're there to listen. And don't forget to ask how they'd like to be supported." Be there for them, even if that just means getting all snuggled up on the couch together and binge-watching your favorite show while ordering some pizza.
It's hard to understand how someone handles pain, because everyone is different. However, Huerta suggests simply asking your partner, "'What can I do right now to help you?' They might be ready for advice, or they might just need a hug. If you don't ask, you won't know."
By simply asking your partner what they need from you during this time, you'll be able to provide that for them instead of worrying about saying or doing the wrong thing. They might need for you to cover their half of the grocery bill for the week, or maybe they'd really appreciate your help working on their resume. It's important that you ask before just assuming what they need. No one likes to feel smothered, or like others feel sorry for them. The best way to make sure your partner is getting the support they need is to simply ask how you can help! It's that easy.
It's never fun to lose your job, no matter how or why it happens. But your partner will land on their feet in no time, and chances are, getting through this hardship together will probably make you a stronger couple. Take a deep breath! Both of you have got this.
