Relationships
14 Tweets About Dating A Taurus That Are Way Too Freaking Accurate

Updated: 
Originally Published: 
Shutterstock; @_SaturnReturn/Twitter

If you want to see Taurus in the form of a fictional character, look no further than Joey Tribbiani from Friends. Joey loves food, sex, and being cozy. Joey knows how to turn on the charm. Joey falls fast and hard, but if something (or someone) involves making an effort, he's over it. He is Taurus epitomized, and if you were born between April 20 and May 20, you probably consider this Friends character a kindred spirit. Taureans are the carnal pleasure-seeking signs of the zodiac, and if you are one or know one, these tweets about dating a Taurus will make so much sense to you.

Those born under the sign of the bull are often accused of being "lazy," but I'd like to think Taureans simply know how to enjoy life's pleasures. Their love of silky sheets and decadent meals may lead to you believe Taureans are chill, but make no mistake — if you mess with the bull, you get the horns. Dating a Taurus can either feel like a luxurious, lust-filled holiday or an epic battle of wills, and these tweets perfectly explain all the complexities of having a relationship with this indulgent and extravagant sign.

The Way To A Taurus' Heart Is Through Their Stomach

Want to woo a Taurus? Get in the kitchen and make them something delicious. For them, food is (almost) better than sex.

They Really, Really Love Food

They love introducing their dates to great food just as much as they love eating it themselves. Be warned: Making restaurant reservations is not a task to be taken lightly.

They Never Hesitate To Treat Themselves

How many soy candles and weighted blankets is too many? For a Taurus, the limit does not exist.

They're Always Down To Chill

Netflix, sleep, eat, repeat.

They Enjoy Taking Care Of Others

As much as this sign loves self-care, they're always down to coddle you, too. After all, no one understands the joy of physical and material pleasures quite like them.

They Believe In The Power Of Retail Therapy

Taureans believe there's no heartbreak a shopping spree can't fix.

They're Super Sensual

Taureans love everything that makes them feel good: food, naps, scented candles, warm blankets, and — of course — sex. They know how to work their charm and get dates under their Egyptian cotton sheets.

They're Relentless Pleasure Seekers

The best gift you can give a Taurus? A spa day. And maybe a nightly back massage. And if you could also feed them grapes while they recline on a chaise lounge chair, that would be great.

They Don't Hold Back

A Taurus may not be the most outgoing or assertive person, but this sign is determined, and once they find something (or someone) they want, they keep their eyes on the prize.

They're Grudge Holders

Taureans remember everything, and if you wrong them, they may pretend to get over it — but really, they're going to harbor resentment until the end of time (or until they can even the score).

They Never Forgive, And They Definitely Don't Forget

Date a Taurus, and they're unlikely to let you leave their sight. Break up with a Taurus, and they're unlikely to ever stop commenting, "Ew," on every picture you post of you and your new boo.

They Aren't Always Willing To Make A Big Effort

Remember, Taureans love that life of leisure, and while they're happy to cook you a four-course meal, they'd probably laugh if you asked them to pick you up at the airport.

They're A Bit Obstinate

If you think you're going to win an argument with a Taurus, then you're just wasting you time, my friend.

They Love With All Their Hearts

OK, they may come on a bit strong at times, but Taureans are hopeless romantics, and if they're into you, they'll give you all the food, candles, back rubs, and love you've ever desired.

Everyone should learn to treat themselves more, and when you date a Taurus, treating yourself is basically a way of life. If you value great meals and long naps, a relationship with a Taurus may be exactly what you need.

This article was originally published on