Over time, I've learned that there are two things I need to survive in life: Compliments and coffee. Much like Tinker Bell, I need people to believe in me in order to stay alive. (And by "believe in me," I mean tell me I'm smart and pretty and you definitely cannot tell that I haven't slept in five days. Which is where the coffee comes in.) The point is — whether we'd like to admit this or not — we all benefit from (or desperately crave) a little verbal validation every now and again. And the best compliments for girlfriends (and everyone else, for that matter) often have nothing to do with looking pretty or deceitfully well-rested...
After asking a handful of women about the hottest compliments they've heard from their partners, many agreed that the greatest compliments are those that touch on a trait they're proud to possess (or aim to possess) — not, like, "Your body's banging." Though TBH, hearing that never really hurts.
Personally, my favorite compliments have always been the ones I've heard secondhand. When a boyfriend's best friend has turned to me and said, "You should hear the way he talks about you, we've never seen him this happy before." Or when a guy has thanked my mom for raising me just as she did. There's no agenda in a compliment like that, and they just make my heart glow.
At the end of the day, anyone can praise your smile or your figure. But your ambition and character and warmth? Those are the compliments only a select few can give, which makes them special and touching, as well as incredibly hot.
Here's what 12 women said were the greatest compliments they've ever gotten from a partner. Fair warning: You might need some tissues (and maybe a cold shower?) after reading these.
He said he admires me a lot, which means more to me than any physical compliment — like, there are traits of mine that he not only likes but looks up to. Honestly, I teared up when he said that. Thank gosh it was over text.
—Miranda*, 24
Last week, my boyfriend said I was 'hotter than a young Angelina Jolie.' I should probably print that text message out and frame it. I mean, come on, have you seen her? I'll take the compliment.
—Hannah, 24
You're like a young, hot Hillary Clinton.
— Kelsey, 24
I had a partner who would always say that he loved watching me study or work because I looked powerful and sure of myself. Definitely a unique compliment, but one that I appreciated because I love studying and working but I don't always feel very confident about my skill at either. It was nice to have someone recognize that in me and be attracted to it.
—Sydnee, 26
The night I first developed a crush on my current boyfriend, I was calling a friend to tell her I'd just finished parking and was walking up to her party. When she was on the phone with me, I overheard a boy (my now-boyfriend) in the background say, 'Who are you talking to? Francis? Francis with the pretty green eyes?' And it was game over for me. We've been together for seven years now.
—Francis, 23
I like when I’m complimented on traits that I already see and recognize in myself and take pride in. So when my boyfriend tells me he’s proud of the fact that I just cranked out a 12-hour, non-stop day of studying or how impressed he is that I did a 6 a.m. workout before being on campus from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. I appreciate that. Those are meaningful compliments to me because I know they’re accurate and I actively try to be very productive and determined.
But probably, the best compliment is being told that he appreciates me for me. For how protective I am of my friends and family, for how crazy determined I am, for being goofy and having an inappropriate sense of humor. And just that he feels he can completely be himself around me, that he’s comfortable opening up to me in a way he’s never felt comfortable before.
—Tori, 24
My girlfriend once told me that I was exactly her brand of heroine. I honestly don't know whether she meant the drug or like, a female hero, but either way. It really turned me on.
—Crystal, 23
We were talking about picking one word to describe each other and he said, after much thought, that my word was 'complex.' And I was immensely charmed by this. I don't know if it was meant as a compliment, per se, but it was something, to me, that meant I wasn't basic. I was dimensional, and layered, and that meant I was different from other people.
—Brittany, 26
The other night, my boyfriend said, 'I don't think I could ever get bored of you.' And I feel the same way about him.
—Sam, 24
My boyfriend said he needs me around so he always has an excuse to take pics. And like yes.
—Jenny*, 22
My ex-boyfriend and I had been friends for a while before we started dating, and he'd always known me in a very Goody Two-Shoes context. After we got together, he once turned to me and said, completely earnestly, 'I knew you were funny and smart and beautiful, but you are honestly the sexiest woman I have ever met. And I can't believe I didn't see that coming.' Will never forget that.
—Elizabeth*, 25
Feeling dizzy from all of that swooning? Same. Future partners, take note.
*Names have been changed. Quotes have been edited and condensed for clarity.
