Who hasn't been driving topless and then tried to smooth things over with an officer by trying to seduce them? Honestly, how is this even news? We've all been there, am I right, ladies?
Jamie Schmude crashed her car on November 24, which wouldn't necessarily be news had she not been topless with her jeans down around her thighs when police showed up.
To be fair -- it is difficult to drive when your jeans are around your thighs. Of course, being super intoxicated probably didn't help either.
According to TC Palm, Martin County Fire Rescue workers brought Schmude to the hospital. There, she screamed at the nurses and caused a "big scene" for 20 minutes until she passed out.
The report says,
[Schmude] woke up several times and belched loudly which emitted the very strong odor of alcohol.
After finishing her burp, the officer informed Schmude that she had gotten into a car crash. She responded that she was "always getting into trouble."
To continue perhaps getting into trouble, Schmude attempted to seduce the police officer.
Schmude apparently told the officer,
You are the sexiest thing I've seen, I'm going to (engage in a highly sexual act with you).
She began to bite her lower lip, moaned while looking at the deputy and thrust her hand downtown.
I'm sure her loud burp didn't set the certain mood necessary for the police office to return these feelings. That's like rule one of seducing a cop.
She did this not once, not twice, but thrice, according to the affidavit.
You have to admire her tenacity, I guess.
Schmude was arrested on a DUI charge and escorted to jail, where she was "very belligerent and cocky."
She bragged about the amount of Ciroc she drank and blew a 0.168 and 0.161, double the legal limit of 0.08.
How sexy is this police officer, though?