People Are Pretending To Faint Just To See If Their Pets Give A F*ck

by Eitan Levine

The lesson here is your pet probably does not give a royal f*ck if you are in physical trouble or not.

For some reason I don't understand, people in Japan are filming themselves pretending to faint while walking their pets just to see how they react.

The funny part is, aside from the fact that this is the most painfully obvious cry for attention in the history of mankind, pet owners are slowly finding out that their animals do not give a single solitary crap if they are in mortal peril.

“Cool, cool. Thanks for everything. I'm out.”

今流行りのやってみた 飼い主がいきなり倒れた時の反応うちの犬ver. — 私が噂のかぢゅまんです(՞ټ՞☝ (@zu_romi) September 15, 2015

“Soooo fun. This was SOOOOOO fun. Def gonna catch up real soon."

やってみた! 飼い主がいきなり倒れた時の反応 — aona (@47Ao) September 15, 2015

“Oh no! OK, well. You got your stuff, I got my stuff. Let's def hang out real soon. OK, gotta go! Baiiii!”

飼い主がいきなり倒れた時の反応 やってみた… — 東谷かな (@gashitani42) September 15, 2015

“You know what? I gotta thing. You handle this, and we'll meet back up later? Def hang V soon.”

飼い主がいきなり倒れた時の反応 — するめ (@amiyaki673) September 13, 2015

“Ugh! DENISE! We GOTTA stop meeting like this! I have like the MOST pressing appointment across town. DM me! We'll def do something -- def soon! Crazy week!"

飼い主がいきなり倒れた時の反応 — たかけん@10月東京 (@gunsli_aaron) September 13, 2015

“Go f*ck yourself.”

飼い主がいきなり倒れた時の反応 やってみた笑 — 泉里 (@Sen2472) September 13, 2015

For real, though, the only animals that seem to care are pet birds, and that's useless because birds are the most unhelpful animals (aside from seahorses and moths) when it comes to helping people out who are in mortal danger.

飼い主がいきなり倒れた時の反応(鳥) — D垢@もふ (@d_mmky122) September 14, 2015

"Lassie" was super inaccurate.

A more real-life version of that show would just involve two minutes of some kid yelling, "Lassie! Go get help! I'm in the bottom of this well!" and then 15 minutes of Lassie just wandering around, enjoying life.

Citations: People in Japan are pretending to faint on walks to see if their dogs care (Independent)