While you were all deep in slumber Thursday night, the UK crumbled at the seams by voting for Brexit.
It will leave the EU and become independent for no apparent reason. Honestly, the sane UK people never saw this coming. It's as shocking as making Donald Trump president.
JK Rowling knows that.
That's why she wishes she could call on Harry Potter to clean up this entire mess.
Like many of us, the author has taken the issue to heart.
Make no mistake about it, guys, the majority of people voting for Brexit are old, angry racists who think leaving the EU will better manage the flow of migrants into the UK.
It affects everything from trade deals to the exchange rate. Negatively.
And I've got news for you -- you can't just sit back and watch the fireworks, America, this affects you too.
It's going to impact your mortgage rates and 401ks. How severely is not quite clear yet. The market is going to be unstable in the coming weeks and will hopefully level off.
But the danger now is Brexit sparking a chain reaction of fear that sends Wall Street investors running for the hills. Hopefully you guys can keep a level head about the whole thing, and not make any stupid decisions LIKE WE'VE JUST DONE.
*Throws laptop across the room in anger*