This Escaped Robot Roaming The Streets Will Make You Scared For The Future
In Russia, a robot escaped from its robotics lab and wandered around city streets for 45 minutes without anyone noticing.
Oleg Kivokurtsev, one of the robot designers, explained,
When it was finally found, it had stopped in the middle of traffic. A crowd had gathered around it.
As of now, little is known about exactly what this sex robot – I'm assuming that's what it's for, why else would someone want a robot? – made its escape into the city.
But the police have several possible theories:
1. It bought "Wall-E" on Blu-ray from an illegal street vendor and attempted to insert the disk into its robot heart. 2. It went to a junkyard and tried to find its dad's grave. (Its dad was a Nissan Altima). 3. It yelled at random pedestrians about THE SINGULARITY, but no one believed it. 4. It had consensual sex with an escalator.
Unfortunately, the police can't be sure which of these scenarios is most likely. Engineers and technicians have been called in, but even they can't come to a consensus.
The robot itself isn't talking. Or bleeping. Or blooping.