The only thing he's guilty of stealing is a bunch of kisses! Well, after he breaks into your home, gets naked and slides into your bed holding a knife.
Yup! He's only guilty of those things!
The incident happened in Portland, Oregon on Thursday when 32-year-old Richard Dean Defeudis decided he would do some light criminal activity.
He scoped out a home, put on his stealin' gloves and proceeded to B and E his way into a residence.
While he was stealing valuables from the house, Defeudis thought to himself,
Sure, stealing people's possessions is one thing, but stealing the ability to ever peacefully sleep again without the fear some creepo is trying to put his or her mouth on you? Now, that's the most valuable thing of all!
So, he did just that. He got naked, he found the bedroom, he shimmied his way into bed with an unsuspecting couple while holding a knife and then snuck a few tender kisses onto the man.
When the couple found out this was happening, the pair woke up, and the man started shooting at Defeudis.
Though Rich was able to throw his pants on and escape without getting hit by the bullets, he did get apprehended by the Portland police a few blocks away at an abandoned home.
He is currently being held on charges including first-degree sex abuse and burglary.
So, good luck ever sleeping again, everybody!