If you ever get the chance to go to the MTV VMAs, drop everything and attend that mutha like it's the last event on Earth.
It's basically a ticket to see all of your favorite singers perform at one big party x100.
And, believe me, MTV looks after its guests. I'm talking swag swag city.
Let's break it down with a list of the most chronic things that happen behind the scenes at the VMAs. But first, a word of warning...
1. If your date is wearing stupid-high shoes, prepare to get hurt/spend half your time waiting around.
Embrace the shoes; it's all part of the experience.
2. You're a VIP now, so you can sneer at the peasant line.
True story. These guys were waiting for a spot in the standing pit where there's a chance to get air time and touch celebs.
I don't know how long they'd been queuing for, but I didn't care because I was a very important person and above them.
3. FREE BAR
Yeah, we need to talk about this. The urban myth is real: There's a free bar at the VMAs, and it's not just a choice of Bud Light and boxed wine. NO. Think bigger. Think G-worthy baller dranks like GREY GOOSE. Yes, you can drink at your seat.
I don't even like Grey Goose, but it just felt right, you know?
4. FREE FOOD.
Peckish after that orange margarita? No issue. Take your pick between the beef brisket and several other blurry options I was too drunk to read.
5. You'll fall in love with Kanye West
Love him or hate him, this guy's got presence. The crowd went sorority-girl WILD for Kanye. So wild, in fact, that he couldn't even start his speech because everyone was chanting "YEEZY, YEEZY, YEEZY!"
6. You can't help but gawk at all the celebs like they're caged zoo animals.
You're basically 50 yards away from the world's biggest celebs at all times and that's awesome.
7. You'll think everyone is famous...
Dressing like a celeb basically means you are one. I don't know who this person is, but she looked famous so obviously had to take a photo.
8. ...Including yourself
Look at how many people viewed this. I only have 150 followers on Instagram.
Thanks, MTV, for making me feel like I'm the only girl in the woooorld.