68 Thoughts That Go Through Your Head On Payday
Is there anything sweeter than waking up on the 1st and 15th of the month to find that your once depressingly vacant bank account has been bestowed with your biweekly paycheck?
After weeks and weeks of floundering, you finally have money in the bank. You can pay your rent, cover your bills and swap ramen noodles for organic produce.
You know, the stuff adults do.
While all that much-needed cash is a huge blessing, how you spend your paycheck can be a real test of character.
When you’ve spent the last 14 days accruing a massive pile of sweaters and booties in your various online shopping carts, it can be very tempting to press “check out” when you seemingly have money to burn.
You have to see the big picture, though. Adulthood isn’t about free shipping on purchases of $50 or more — it’s about responsibility.
The truth is, we’re in the years after college graduation, likely not making the big bucks. We're trying to save and pay bills, all the while supporting ourselves. As much as we feel like we deserve to treat ourselves to new things, we should be trying our hand at self-sufficiency. After all, according to Capital One's Millennial Mindset on Money Survey, 27 percent of Millennials say that establishing a sizable nest egg is a big priority.
Living paycheck to paycheck doesn't translate into vacations or that substantial nest egg you really need.
We’ve all sat in our shared apartments and waited anxiously for payday. We’ve all been irrationally excited to spend our hard-earned money. We’ve all thrown caution to the wind and shot ourselves in the foot until our next pay round.
Here are 68 thoughts you have on payday.
1. It’s here! It’s really here!
3. It's finally here!
4. It has felt like a century since I had any money.
5. Refresh, refresh, refresh.
6. If I have to refresh this page one more time, I am going to lose it.
7. Where is my direct deposit?
8. I swear, I...
9. Here it is!
11. Sweet, wonderful money.
12. I’m RICH!
13. This is less than I expected, but okay.
14. Taxes get me every single time.
15. What will I do with all of this cash?
16. I should probably pay my rent.
17. ...and my electricity bill.
18. But I have all that stuff in my shopping cart on that website.
19. It’s probably gathering dust.
20. So, I should buy that stuff.
21. I deserve to treat myself.
22. I have a lot of bills I need to pay.
23. Why is being an adult so complicated?
24. It’s so hard.
26. This is kind of sad because I know I’m going to be broke again tomorrow.
27. I need a financial intervention.
28. ...or a simple tool that shows me what I even spend all my money on.
29. I also need about five new pairs of shoes.
30. Boots would be nice.
31. I mean the seasons are changing, after all.
32. How does this always happen to me?
33. Probably because I’m the kind of person who goes into a supermarket for eggs and comes out with a receipt for $200 and no eggs.
34. Speaking of eggs, I need to go grocery shopping.
35. I am going to turn my life around.
36. I’m going to save this money.
37. I’m going to put it to good use.
38. I’m going to put it in my savings account!
39. That’s what a grown-up, mature person would do, right?
40. What is the point of payday when all my money ends up going to bills?
41. Why slave away at a job only to still be poor?
42. I have to put away a specific amount every month starting right now.
43. I have Christmas shopping to do.
44. I want to take a vacation with BAE in February.
45. Plane tickets and margaritas aren’t free.
46. I’m so conflicted.
47. I’m so happy to have this money and so sad I’ve already rationed out how to spend every single cent.
48. None of this can go to my lonely online shopping cart because I went too crazy on Black Friday.
49. Okay, I need to chill with spending.
50. I can handle my finances like a responsible adult.
51. I went to college! I have a degree! I'm smart!
52. I've read so many articles on how to manage my money.
53. My parents taught me about my 401k, so that has to count for something.
54. Stock portfolio?
55. No, that is too complicated.
56. Let’s get online here and go into my checking account.
57. Okay, here we go. I'm transferring so much to my savings.
58. It’s happening! I'm saving money!
59. I can’t look at what's left in my checking account.
60. My poor shopping cart is doomed.
61. This is necessary. This is the right choice.
62. Awesome, I'm left with pennies.
63. Go me! Here I am, saving money, left with nothing to spend.
64. I’m going to pay my rent tomorrow.
65. I’m going to call my mom and tell her all about this hugely responsible move I've made.
66. My parents are going to be so proud.
67. Maybe they’ll send me a present for being such a grownup!
68. I’m such a mature adult.