It's hard to imagine a positive light at the end of the tunnel when your parents are battling through a divorce. You find yourself questioning your relationships, your friends and basically any form of human interaction you have. It will make you wonder what is real, what friendships have longevity and what's fleeting.
However, amongst the anxiety, you will find something pretty special: the feeling of wanting to find a love so strong that nothing will break it. You'll want a love that refuses to let you go through what your parents have gone through, and a love that won't let your kids go through it too.
The "daddy issues"
I'll be real with you: If you're a single girl and your parents break up in your 20s, things are going to get weird. Read: You are going to get weird.
A strong cocktail of hatred toward men, with an added shot of one-night stands stirred generously with a hint of daddy issues, makes for the perfect mess. Of course, being a strong independent woman seems like the right answer right now, because trust issues are at an all time high.
And let's face it: The dude you picked up at 11 pm doesn't actually want to hear your life story, but you'll tell it to him anyway because having a pet duck when you were 10 actually sounds really cool in your head.
Thankfully, he will probably still let you come home with him because that's just the kind of stand up gentlemen you picked up in the bar. You'll forget his name, but will still probably like three of his photos on Instagram just to stay relevant.
In a generation of f*ckboys, it's easy to lose sight of what is real.
In the midst of your temporary lovers, deep down, you will be longing for a proper connection with someone. Unfortunately, the Tinder match from Tuesday night who took you on two dates and bought you an expensive meal isn't quite the best person for the job.
He'll flatter you, and make you feel like the goddamn princess that you are. You'll start to tell him about the trials and tribulations of your family, which he'll attempt to be interested in, but probably never call you again because "he's just not really into dating right now."
Thankfully you'll have those trusty friends by your side to remind you that they aren't all bad.
With friends like these who needs...
Right now you're probably thinking, well f*ck, it's all going to be a weird AF ride and I'm going to lose my marbles and join a convent. Close -- but no.
Now is the time when you'll realize you don't need a deep sexual connection with a dude (Although let's be real, it helps.), but instead you need to find a dude you can trust. You need a best guy friend who is going to represent everything you need in a loyal man.
You'll want someone who will trump the daddy issues, and make you remember what it felt like to trust someone. Find them, love them and never let them go; they are your life line.
Don't fall for him though, don't be "that girl." Be you, the weird you, who has so much love in your heart ready to flow. Let that love out.
"When I fall in love, it will be forever."
Now, you've finally learned to trust the other side again, the men have made their way back over your mental "Trump Wall," and you're ready to talk to those foreigners like normal people again.
It will be a change; the pace will feel different and the ones who you talk to will mean something. The guys you interact with will be ones you want a future with. Trust and love are two words that will mean more to you than they ever did in the past.
You won't be out yelling, "KATIE I JUST WANT THE D" -- OK, you still will sometimes, but it will be for gags, not for real. The positive thing that comes our of your parents' divorce will be clear eventually. You will realize how important it is to find the right person, and you'll find the right love.