What To Do When Your Best Friend Gets A Boyfriend
That boyfriend eventually turned into her husband, and now it feels like we're not even friends anymore. It really sucks.
You go from seeing that person almost every day, to maybe once a month... if you're even that lucky.
It cuts the deepest when you have a bestie who doesn't know how to manage multiple relationships in her life. Some people can truly balance their friends and boyfriend like total champs, while others have to pick between the two.
They get swept up in the love, and are out of your life within the blink of an eye.
I understand the anger that can come from losing your best friend to her boyfriend, because I've been there a few times.
Here are five ways you can cope with the loss.
1. Know That It's Not A Reflection On You
You may be thinking there must be something wrong with you. You keep asking her to hang out, and she keeps rejecting you.
You can't believe she's saying "no," so you're thinking you must have done something wrong, or you're no longer fun in her eyes.
But don't even think about letting those thoughts consume you. You're not the one who has changed, she has... and it's her loss.
Just know you are still the fun bestie who she genuinely enjoyed hanging out with.
2. It's OK To Be Mad, But Don't Let Those Negative Feelings Consume You
You still love your bestie (deep down), even if she's disappointing you at the moment.
You want to yell at her for ignoring you, or tell her she's making a terrible mistake. But doing this will only make things worse.
Even if she's being a bad friend, you don't have to be one as well. You're allowed to be angry at your BFF, but don't dwell on the negativity.
If you want to confront her, give yourself a day or two to think about what you want to say first. Make sure it's coming from a place of love.
You don't want a spontaneous outburst to completely end your friendship.
3. Try To Compromise
If she's not hanging out with you because she wants to spend all her time with her new bae, try to find a happy medium.
Your bestie is probably tied at the hip with her boyfriend, and feels like you don't want to hang out with him. Let it be known that he's more than welcome to join your plans, and maybe you'll see her more.
Sure, it sucks that they're a packaged deal when you're really craving your solo time with her, but it's better to see her than to not see her at all.
4. Indulge In All Of The Things That Make You Happy
What's the best way to get over a bad breakup? Treating yourself to all of the things you love.
Make a Spotify playlist of songs that make you feel good, drink your favorite wine, and stream a movie marathon of the classics. You deserve it.
When I stopped seeing my best friend and roommate because she started spending all of her time at her boyfriend's place, I made a sick blanket fort in our apartment, ate my favorite brownies, and watched You've Got Mail. It made me feel so much better.
5. Focus On Your Other Friendships
You can always hold onto the fact that your friend's relationship might not last forever, and she'll come running back to you. But in my case, my best friend ended up marrying her boyfriend, so I'm never getting her completely back.
Some friendships are only meant to be for a short period of time, even if they were the greatest.
Now that you no longer have your BFF around on the reg, it's prime time to focus on the other friendships in your life, and maybe even ones you've lost touch with.
As much as it sucks that the PB to your J has dumped you for a boyfriend, it will get better. I promise.
Now, go build that blanket fort, and push play on You've Got Mail. I'll be right there!