Keep Your Past In The Past: Never Go Back To Those You've Left Behind

by Kirsten Corley

There are some people in our lives who enter like hurricanes, destroying everything in their path. Then, they make an exit once they have caused a mess. Their name becomes infamous to everyone who has been affected. They don’t care about what is left behind, only the fact they have successfully caused destruction.

And just when you begin to pick up the pieces with the loyal few who stay by your side, the clouds come rolling in yet again. It's like they know just when you are beginning to get things together and feel happy again.

There are some people who just think they have a right to come in and out of our lives. There are some doors that take a long time to close, and when that finally does occur, we should not, under any circumstances, open them again.

But we do -- time and time again.

It’s the classic line we tell our friends as we are sipping coffee and our phone goes off. There is a rush of coldness that stings from your head to your toe upon seeing his or her name across the screen, despite the warm drink in front of you.

And before you even finish the sentence, you look at your friend and say, “Guess who?” And your friend knows. He or she tells you do not answer, but you can’t resist.

There is something beautiful we can’t quite put our finger on when it comes to storms. Maybe it is the noise, or the darkness that captivates us. Maybe it is the risk; maybe we all like gambling and taking chances with people we know we shouldn’t.

There is something both cruel and kind about his or her lips on yours, and it keeps you coming back for more. And even when you both say it’s over, you know it never is.

But why do we do this? If it were our friends, we would tell them they are making a mistake; they deserve better. They deserve someone who doesn’t lead them on and lead a life of blurry lines.

We like this idea that we can change people, and we know they aren’t always just bad. We get captivated by their good qualities, the late-night conversations and promises you hope they won’t break. We fall for the what-if scenario.

Lauren Conrad said it best: “Every girl wants to be the right person. Every girl wants to be the one girl who can change that guy.” But you can’t change people; you can only accept them for who they are. “You can’t love half of one person.”

The most wonderful people are the ones who not only love you at your best, but also at your worst.

These people aren’t the ones who leave when things get messy because they understand there is much good that may come with the little bit of bad. But when it comes to certain people, you can’t use their good aspects as an excuse to cover the bad.

You ask your friends for advice, but the only reason you do that is because you know the answer. In time, you will realize how much time you wasted, but that realization will come when you are ready to accept that.

We all like games, but as we grow up and lead adult lives, the games that captivated our young adult lives begin to grow old. We want something serious and clearly defined.

The blurry lines eventually will fade, and the game itself will eventually end. It’ll happen when you are in that relationship you deserve and never think twice about answering that text.

It will be in that moment they realize they don’t have anything left to destroy, and they will be forced to go somewhere else where no one has heard their names. But like every level-five hurricane, their names remain famous in the old town they left behind.