The eyes are the windows to the soul, and your soul is the director of your life.
At least that's what some psychic told me once.
But today, kids, we're analyzing your eye color.
Blue-eyed babies actually have the second most common eye color, but they consider themselves to be mystical unicorn creatures of the human world, like God gave them some special fucking power to charm the masses.
It probably goes back to some Aryan brotherhood-level of entitlement, but whatever it is, you guys need to check yourselves.
Just because your eyes look like a peaceful zen pond where I can find the stillness my soul has been longing for doesn't mean your charms will work on me!
Are you an actual cat? A witch? Wizard? Mermaid? Who cares!
All I know is, you are special. Green eyes are one of the rarest eye colors in the world.
These people are an enigma. They are the kind of people who you get into bed with and don't come out for days.
That's possibly because they're casting spells on you and shit, but it doesn't matter.
Their eyes are a botanical garden. Take a walk around those gardens and lose yourself in them, and you'll come out forever changed.
Brown eyes are the most common eye color. In fact, 55 percent of the world's population has it.
But, that doesn't mean you aren't special. It just means you're not, like, REALLY special.
There are benefits to fitting in, though. For one thing, you're probably less likely to fall into some soul-crushing gambling or drinking addiction because of a nagging desire to be "different."
You probably know how to dress really well, too. I mean, you have to stand out somehow in this crazy world full of "Brown Eyed Girl(s)."
If you're lucky enough to have tie-dye eyeballs (which is exactly what hazel eyes are, make no mistake about it), then you're also lucky enough to have the adaptability of a chameleon.
You contain multitudes. You're strong and silent as well as an introvert and an extrovert.
Because of your variety, you live in the moment and hold the wisdom of the ages.
Dark brown or black
Black eyes are like deep cavernous wells you can hide your secrets in.
These people are the more trustworthy than anyone you've ever met. Their advice comes from experience and from a level-headed indifference to emotional distress.
They don't have time for drama; the have black eyes for Christ's sake! Do you know how deep that is?
These people have the strength to stand their ground and stick to their guns when the going gets tough.
People with light blue, green, brown or grey eyes are more sensitive to sunlight, which magically endows them with a sensitivity toward other people and their emotional pain.
Perhaps being blinded by the happiness of the sun's rays allowed them to develop a keen eye for sadness in others.
Whatever it is, people with light eyes are the ones you want to go to when you're really down in the dumps.
They have an uplifting outlook on life, and they're great listeners.
Always remember, regardless of what this article says or how much melanin is in your eyeballs, your personality is actually determined first by you and your decisions.
Now, get out there and make something of yourself!