Women are not equals. Or at least, the world doesn’t treat them as such. Setting aside the horrible practices in many countries across the world of suppressing women and forcing them to remain submissive slaves to their male counterparts, things in more "progressive" countries are only incrementally better.
Even in a country like the United States, women aren’t treated as equal.
I can give you examples and reasons for my saying so, but I’m sure this isn’t a fact that you aren't already privy to -- and if you aren’t, Google it. Women aren’t treated as equals, but nevertheless wish to be treated as equals.
The one thing I want to discourage women from thinking is that they need to fight their battles entirely on their own. Sure, they could and they're capable of doing so. But fighting one’s battles entirely on one’s own is the same as facing an army on your own -- victory being very unlikely.
And more difficult than it needs to be. This is why human beings partner up -- not just to reproduce or to experience “romantic love” -- to become a team and to conquer the world together. Self-empowerment isn’t a journey, contrary to popular belief, that one has to tackle solo.
As a man, your job is to help your woman empower herself. This, you may be surprised to hear, does not mean you ought to let her fight her own battles entirely on her own. So what should you be doing?
1. Be enthusiastic about her goals and dreams.
Motivation arises from excitement. Staying excited about one’s own project(s) gets more and more difficult the longer the process of accomplishing that goal becomes.
It’s easy to be motivated at the start, but to stay continually motivated -- every day for months at a time -- gets harder the longer you pursue your goals.
If you are enthusiastic about her work, it’ll be much easier for her to remain excited and feeling empowered.
2. Don’t distract her when she should be focused.
Staying focused can be difficult enough as it is… don’t be the catalyst. When she needs to keep at the grind, let her be.
Let her do her thing because that’s what she both wants and needs to be doing. If you’re that bored, go find someone else to distract.
3. Distract her when she needs that distraction.
We all need distractions from time to time, but only at specific times. When she needs to focus, let her focus.
But when she needs a distraction, when she needs to get her mind off things so she can get back to work the next day with full force and vigor, then make sure she has a great night and forget about all her worries.
4. Help her with the smaller things.
Life is difficult because there is just so much for us to stay on top of. Aside from the big-picture goals, there are tons of tiny little things that need to be taken care of.
It may mean helping her clean or doing her laundry for her, but if you love her, you won’t mind.
You surely have a lot on your own plate, but if you help her with the little things when she needs help, she’ll help you with the little things when you need the help. This way, you both win.
5. Be her rock, her solid ground to stand on when the rest of the world seems to shake and rumble.
One of the most difficult parts of life is going through the scariest, most unpleasant, most heartbreaking things alone. Some things we do need to do alone.
Some things we need to fail on our own in order to come out stronger. Don’t throw your support at her, but allow her to lean on you when she decides that’s what she needs.
Even knowing that you are there for her will allow her to find the strength to push through.
6. Keep your pace matched as much as possible.
It’s difficult for a woman to keep the momentum going when her partner is a lazy little sh*t. Stay focused, stay energetic and stay hungry yourself. Follow your own dreams and stay driven.
On the days that getting out of bed becomes difficult, seeing you get that running start may very well help her to find the strength she needs to continue moving forward. You don’t need to compete, but show her that you’re not giving up and she won’t either.
7. Force her to make decisions that she doesn’t especially want to make.
Nobody really likes making the decisions that are tough to make. However, if the love of your life wants to be fully empowered, she needs to take the wheel as much as possible.
Ask her for advice on your own decision-making as well to show her how much you trust her judgment -- it may help her trust her judgment herself.
8. Don’t allow her to give up when times get tough.
Times will always get tough sooner or later. Most people will give up the second things get uncomfortable -- men and women alike. If you know that calling it quits is the wrong decision, tell her that’s what you think.
In the end, giving up is her decision… but you want to help her find the courage to continue if all that is holding her back is fear of failure.
9. Help her see why she should consider calling it quits if you feel that she needs to move on to the next project.
Sometimes there is no rational reason to continue following whatever plan we outlined for ourselves -- sometimes the smart thing to do is call it quits. If you think she is making the wrong decision by continuing on her path, then tell her your reasons.
Tell her that you will support her regardless of what she decides, but that you feel it may be wiser for her to change her direction a bit.
Feeling empowered is the result of successes, not failures. If you can help her avoid massive failures -- or even minimize the damage -- then you ought to try and do so.
10. Help her network.
Networking is key to success. Without having the right people around you, becoming a success is basically impossible.
Introduce her to your network and then go out together and network together. Two people can cover a lot more ground than one.
11. Accomplish your own successes.
Seeing you succeed should motivate her to keep pushing on her own. When we see what others can accomplish, it often gives us hope that we ourselves can do great things.
Show her what it’s possible to accomplish and make her believe she can do the same, if not better -- because she can.
12. Make sure she's relaxed.
I'm talking about many things, but mostly, yes, I’m talking about sex. She needs different ways to relieve her stress -- massages, rants and orgasms -- especially if her work-life is stressful.
Get creative. The sex will only get better for the both of you.
Photo Courtesy: Twitter