Being a hopeful, single city girl, I’ve done my fair share of speed dating, blind dating, friend dating, match.coming and hitting on men at bars, in which the person on the other side of the table makes faces as I tell the bartender my order.
Well, I’ve finally begun to understand that ordering a cocktail is a social art, as it can tell your date more about you than you thought you were sharing.
While I might not order a Long Island Iced Tea on a first date, playing it safe with a Blue Moon doesn’t always send the right message, either. Maybe we don’t like to admit it, but most people experience that instant flash of judgment when they hear their date’s choice of drink.
Here’s what your drink order might say about you:
With this romantic choice, if you play your cards right, your next date might be a weekend in a nice hotel with a bathtub the size of a closet and champagne. Or, an afternoon movie, then a trip to the dog park with your date’s three dogs.
If you order a PBR, I might text someone to call me in 45 minutes with an emergency so I have an exit plan. If you order an IPA, there might be something there. An order like Sam Adams, Budweiser or Coors will lead me to think that your last family celebration included boxed wine.
If you order a small micro-brew from a local brewery, you’re either a self-conscious hipster or simply know a lot about beer, which is sexy and adult.
While it’s nice to justify that the cranberry juice redeems the vodka, the drink is nothing short of a budget choice for party night, but it can also be kind of endearing.
If he orders it on a date, it’s hard to not wonder whether or not he folds towels perfectly because his grandmother taught him how when he was 8 years old.
If she orders it on a date, you’ll wonder if she’s ever been to the bar without her girlfriends.
Jack & Coke
Where are your Ray Bans? Oh, hanging off of your black tee and nice blue jeans. You’re more creative than the person who just orders a beer.
You might be slightly counter-cultural, but only because it looks good. You’re not snooty about your whiskey, but you’re also not refined. Plus, you’re down-to-earth enough to drink Coke.
Gin & Tonic
I’ll bet if we visit your car on the way out from the bar, there will be a pair of Nikes and workout clothes in the backseat.
Even if you didn’t try to schedule the approximate 50 minutes of our date’s duration, you probably have a sizeable part of your life pinned down and planned.
Clearly, your frat party phase is over, if there was one. You’ve erased it for adulthood, a career, suits and something committed. You might have a plant and you might have a toddler, who you’ll mention on the fourth date.
But, it’s okay because you pay all of your bills and you don’t go home to someone else’s basement at night.
Cosmos get a bad rap as party-girl bar drink, but it’s a very complex cocktail that tastes different everywhere.
If you ask for this, you probably aren’t ashamed of your order and you won’t enter a bar where drinks cost less than $10.
I might not know enough 18th century literature or presidential quotes to be able to keep up with our conversation.
Unless it’s a Mexican restaurant known for margaritas, when the drink is tequila, the night might involve telling bad stories, dropping credit cards on the floor and crawling under the table in a skirt to get it, and falling out of the chair when you leave. It’ll likely be a night neither of you will remember.
It’s sweet, spontaneous and safe; no one will look at you and think they’re on a date with a closet alcoholic, or someone who has a lap dog and spends most evenings downing a bottle of wine and crying in a bathtub.
Anything Ordered On A Beach In Mexico
Long Island iced tea, lemon drop, hurricane, a beer and a shot… Drinks that come frozen — any of these and you know the shenanigans are about to begin.
Maybe your date will end up in a pool or maybe in a park or jail. If anything, it will probably make for a great story the next day.
Photo Courtesy: We Heart It