Anxiety is a very common poison capable of inhabiting our very own inner beings.
We use this perpetual feeling of uneasiness as a crutch of sorts, which enables us to make excuses for things that may very well be possible, if only we could let things be.
The thing most people don't know is anxiety exists only as long as we allow it to.
Just letting it be is the key to everything in life; one just needs to be able to tap into his or her own potential to admit that.
Growing up with an extremely controlling parent who verbally made me feel as small as an ant was extremely debilitating toward my self-worth.
I was made to think from a young age I was never good enough. I wasn't good enough for success unless I complied with X, Y and Z.
I wasn't deserving of financial stability until I met someone else's standards.
I was even made to believe I would never find love unless I made a complete overhaul of who I was.
The reality was none of these ridiculous assertions were even the least bit true; I just was too insecure to figure that out.
When my parents got divorced due to indiscretions by one party (whom I will not disclose, out of respect), my entire world fell apart.
My life crumbled into pieces at my feet, and it seemed so insignificant.
Everything was complete and utter chaos and there was nothing I could do to control it or repair it.
At the age of 9, my anxiety disorder unknowingly began to develop within me.
I began to lean on my own insecurities and was completely unaware of the weakness growing inside of my subconscious.
Soon I would begin to harbor anger and hatred toward things that were out of my control by the sheer nature of the universe.
If I was told no, I held on to that resentment toward whomever stood in my way, and I almost never let go of it.
After a while, my lack of faith in humanity began to emerge out of the darkness I was harboring in the depths of my soul.
A negative and pessimistic person began to appear in my place, and slowly but surely, the happy-go-lucky version of me was almost murdered.
One day, after deciding to physically change my lifestyle in order to maintain a healthy existence, I started to feel more invigorated about my day-to-day life.
I was beginning to lose weight and feel physically better in more ways than one. That's when my anxiety attacks began.
Tightness filled my chest; numbness and tingling grew in my left arm. I clutched my heart for dear life.
This was it, I was having a heart attack, and my life would surely end.
I was so afraid of the possibility that I may not have the opportunity to accomplish what I had always dreamed to.
What about my career? What about my goals? What about my future?
The pain finally subsided after a few hours, and that's when I realized an overhaul of my physically-unhealthy habits would not be enough to achieve true happiness.
I would need to get to the root of things emotionally in order to be able to feel whole again.
I searched deep inside and found something I never thought existed: faith.
Everything that occurs within our personal timelines as human beings has a specific purpose.
Though it may seem completely and utterly terrible and inconvenient, if you are capable of finding the good in that negative situation, your life will become all the more better, almost instantaneously.
This takes hard work on your way of looking at things around you, but with time, it will evolve into a whole new outlook.
This will enable a more positive way of living.
Trusting there is a reason we are here on this planet is a must.
If you are capable of accepting there is a reason to life, contentment will manifest within you.
If one roams through this life with nothing to live for, his or her time on Earth will remain dreadful.
Your fate is in your own hands, but to know there is a final outcome predetermined for us is a type of comfort one cannot achieve any other way.
Live like it's your last day every day.
If you push off everything for next year, next month, next week or even for tomorrow, you will subconsciously anxiously await what's to come.
However, if you do things spontaneously without the fear of what might happen, the outcome will revitalize you.
I'm not suggesting you should rob a bank, but I am suggesting you take that trip you always wanted to, or climb that mountain you always dreamed of.
Once you are able to admit that even the bad things lead us to the good things down the line, impulsive actions will lead to a more fulfilled life.
What doesn't kill you does, in fact, make you stronger.
I know it sounds clichéd, but if you are able to accept that kind of reality, life will be much more uncomplicated.
Surprisingly, this saying is what swayed me into my change on how I view my life and what happens to me on a day-to-day basis.
Coming from a broken home made me mature. I always needed to work for my money, and I was never handed things on a silver platter.
Ultimately, it afforded me strong work ethic.
Growing up heavier and being teased made me realize how important it is not to care what other people think.
Without these components, I would not be the determined and bright young woman I am today.
Once you are able to see your sufferings as gifts that enabled you to stand where you are in the present, you will be able to see things in a whole new light.
When you are able to accomplish this kind of self-journey, you will be able to enjoy the little things you may have been blind to beforehand.
Anxiety can be relieved through meditation focused on positive statements and outlooks.
Next time something terrible happens, try what I do:
1. Take a step back and close your eyes.
2. Inhale deeply and fill every crevice of your body with new air.
3. Think about what just happened to you (i.e. flat tire, speeding ticket, lost job, etc.).
4. Internalize that it happened, it is in the past and there is nothing you can do to change it.
5. Look at it as a positive occurrence in your life (i.e. a speeding ticket will teach me to stop recklessly driving which will inevitably save my life).
I know it's difficult and a bit far-fetched, but if you are able to tell yourself that everything is for the good, you will lead a much more productive, healthy and happy life.
It's the one you are ultimately meant to live.