These Are The Texts Trump Probably Sent Melania After Her RNC Speech

On Sunday, Donald Trump's wife, Melania Trump, gave a speech to the RNC. Apart from being about as proficient at the English language as I am "Proficient at Excel," her speech also featured an entire section that was entirely plagiarized from Michelle Obama's speech at the DNC in 2008.

Yes, not only was it plagiarized, but it was plagiarized from one of the only four women, including Melania, to give a speech exactly like it in the last 8 years.

That's the kind of laziness we're witnessing here from the Trump campaign. Not even the plagiarists are doing a good job.

Now, because this kind of behavior boggles the mind, I decided to try to take a peak, using only my prodigious imagination, into the inner world of the Trump family. I wanted to know how Donald and Melania might talk to each other after the fallout from her gratuitously plagiarized speech.

In an effort to do this, I've made a mock-up of the texts Donald probably sent to Melania after her speech. I am 100 percent sure that one of these exchanges is accurate.

Now, for the sake of accuracy, I've entertained the entire spectrum of possible emotional reactions from Donald to the scandal — there are ones where Donald is angry, ones where he is apologetic and ones where he is murdering interns. I have covered absolutely all bases.