Lifestyle

11 Unfortunate Times Pizza And Alcohol Just Didn't Mix (Photos)

by Connor Toole

Alcohol has been known to lower inhibitions, skew your sense of judgement and generally encourage you to make terrible decisions, which is why so many people end their binges by inhaling whatever greasy food is easiest to get their hands on.

In college, this meant ordering from the generically-named Chinese restaurant (probably Happy Garden or Lucky Dragon) a mile from campus that was the only place to get orange-colored chunks of vaguely identifiable meat delivered at 3 am.

You could only place orders over the phone, and the language barrier was  amplified by my drunken slurring.

It added an unprecedented level of intrigue and mystery to the delivery because you never really knew what was going to be in the bag when you opened it.

However, as I've gotten older and my tastes have become more defined, there's one drunk food I turn to more often than others to constantly wake me up from a vicious bout of indigestion in the middle of the night: pizza.

This may also have something to do with the fact I live directly above a pizza place that closes at 4 am, but I've never been an expert at differentiating between correlation and causation.

I've found a reheated slice does a terrific job at temporarily solving my problem (the "problem" in this case being "a lack of pizza"), but drunk people and pizza don't always get along.

One of the most important rules of eating pizza is "don't pass out facedown into a slice while at a restaurant."

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This guy has the right idea by trying to make it out the door, but sometimes gravity is just too much to resist.

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If you're going to go the "passing out on the floor" route, getting delivery isn't a bad idea.

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At least he managed to take a bite.

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And at least she'll have a tasty snack to wake up to in the morning. Also acne, probably.

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Delivery is also a good idea when you reach a point in the night when you forget which side of the pizza is supposed to face up.

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Pictured: Sacrilege.

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Whether you end up going with delivery or DiGiorno, staying awake until you have a slice in your hand very important.

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Have you ever gotten so drunk  you forgot your pizza on top of the elevator you were riding in? Me neither.

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The best part about dressing up as a skeleton and getting black-out drunk on Halloween is in the morning you'll feel and literally look like death!

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This one might not fit the theme I previously worked so hard to establish, but I can't think of a more fitting way to end.

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