The only thing more personal and weird than my text messages are my phone memos. Every so often, I scroll through the full list just to see where my head was at three months ago, six months ago, or a year ago.
There are old drafts of messages I wrote to people who once mattered to me, zany business ideas, five-year plans, dates of past periods, pros and cons of different relationships I've been in, etc.
It's all there, reminding me of where I've been, and, in my case, where I'm going (which right now includes Chicago, LA, Sydney, Shanghai, business school, Tropical Yoga Retreat and Whole Foods).
Here are the 20 memos you probably have some version of saved in your phone right now.
Because Amazon, Netflix, Hulu Plus, Time Warner, Pinterest, Facebook, Gmail, Instagram, Vimeo, YouTube, DropBox ...
2. To-do lists.
These lists range from priorities within the next hour (e.g., Call back Aunt Lil, sign up for yoga class tonight) to lofty career and life goals and New Year's resolutions (e.g., learn how to code, become CEO of Apple, lose 20 pounds, cut out all sugar, get into Harvard Business School).
3. Funny thoughts.
This is a running list of the all the laugh-worthy stories and ideas you have just in case you finally make it to that open mic or someone get put on the spot to share your most embarrassing story.
4. Baby names.
For when you find yourself on a hospital bed, deep in labor and need to refer to your phone for some inspo.
5. List of hookups/exes/flings.
This will either inspire or depress you depending on how far you've come or regressed.
6. Draft of important text.
You know, the lengthy, perfectly punctuated, brutally detailed rebuttal you sent to your friend during a fight. Or a sick-day note to your boss. Maybe a brave Tinder opener or witty response. Or that chill, nonchalant text you sent to the date who ghosted you. They didn't respond.
7. Restaurants to try.
This one might be organized by neighborhood. It doesn't matter though. Even with a list of 10 new places you're dying to try in any area, you will inevitably end up in said area, forget this list exists and wander into some place that catches your eye because of its downtown, chic vibe and the plethora of attractive faces in the window.
8. Date spots.
Even though you envision a cozy date at that speakeasy with the fireplaces or a fun evening at that new Korean BBQ spot, you also secretly want this new dude you're seeing to show some initiative and plan the date. He will inevitably not choose any place on this list.
9. Random phone number or address.
You took this down at one point for yourself or someone else and now have no idea who it belongs to. Whose "914" number is that, and who or what is on W 37th St.?
10. Someone's lunch order.
Burrito bowl. No scallions, extra cheese, two spicy tuna rolls inside-out with brown rice.
11. List of doppelgangers you need to share with someone.
That guy from accounting looks just like Jason Bateman, and it's time the world knows.
12. Cool companies to research for job openings/career ideas.
Like, trendy startups with cool corporate cultures such as Facebook, Venmo, Netflix, and Instagram.
13. Itineraries to impress your out-of-towner friends.
Bath house in Soho. Barre Class in the Village. Improv in the East Village. Cool bar with hot people, live music and a drink special. Dylan's Candy Bar.
In case your family or friends decide to invest in a present you couldn't otherwise afford for yourself (e.g., socks, underwear, Givenchy bag).
15. Possible wedding venues and hashtags.
#SarahIsSchmidten #TwoPeasInAPodstein #McBrideAndGroom #WalkerThisWay #OneDogTwoKatz. (Hashtag services available upon request.)
16. Business ideas.
Because chatting capabilities for lonely Netflix users needs to be a thing.
17. Hobby ideas.
It's about time you came up with a good answer to those four dreaded words: "Tell me about yourself."
18. Grocery lists.
Have you seen Duane Reade's makeup aisle? Without a list, you will end up with an eye cream you never knew you needed for the wrinkles you never knew you had plus three new nail polish colors.
19. Songs you need to add on Spotify.
Heard a great song at the bar last night? Don't want to forget T. Swift's song list reco that she posted on Instagram? Boom.
20. Icebreakers, never-have-I-evers, and two truths and a lie.
These games exist to fuel anxiety.
It's really hard to figure out what we want in life, and sometimes, making lists like these force us to compare all of our options and make a decision. JK, I don't even know I want for dinner tonight.