Once upon a time, when social media was still young, parents had no idea what you were saying and doing online. Now, if not their own social media accounts, most parents have at least a relative literacy regarding the medium.
Usually, I would be on the side of the kid whose internet presence his parents are spying on. But, in the case of “Cameron,” I am squarely on the side of his mother, who brutally tore into her son online when he left his Facebook open one day.
Here is a transcript of Cameron's mom's burn for the ages.
Hi, this is Cameron's mom. He was a dumbs and left his Facebook open again. Luckily for me, I was able to see the things that Camera says about me behind my back, like calling me a cunt, because I have pneumonia and wouldn't drive him to a girls house. So to all of Cameron's friends, I hope you're not ungrateful little fucktards like my son is. That's all, have a good night.
Cameron, first of all, are you out of your mind? Don't talk like that about your mom online, or anywhere else. It is not a cool thing to do. Cool things to do involve "wearing shades" and "winking at people in a non-threatening way like George Clooney would," not calling your mom the c-word.
(Also, side note to all the moms and not moms out there: Don't say fucktards. I'm pretty sure it originates from combining “fuck” and “retard.” Retard is an offensive word. Um. That's all.)